Clout karma

The feeling others get when responding to your requests based on your public performances and/or notoriety.

Vito: Ryan yu think I should smash this apple on bams head?
Dunns Urn: …$$$$
Vito: Alrighfdtywrraa Idon givafuk what ur sayn ima find Bam
Knoxville: Vito, whatchya up to?

Vito: “raises arm qwith hostility apple in hand”. tell me wher Bams aterallahsmasha and ruin your Clout Karma!
Knoxville: “cowers” my what? WhOa big fella I got money’s,” he says shifty eyed, here take a couple benjis, and lemme see if I can’t “polish” that apple for you” shifts eyes again” just in case you don’t eat it and wanna let Bam have it.
you know how he feels about your body. treat it like you’re in the temples temple, Listening to Tom Templeton. “Grabs apple and wipes his ass with it”
Vito’s dog: *nods* N farts..
Vito: Gimmegrahgagapplekgraplfkpe
Bam runs out of the pantry and starts slapping Don Vito’s bare back while

Knoxville laughs crazily, Vito Pirouettes and smashes apple on Bams sideburn while templetons greatest hits begins to play on a record player near Dunns Urn. Vito’s dog begins dancing and money rains down from the lighting fixtures. Bam wipes apple sauce off his Facebook smirks and says why does this apple smell like shit. Scoops handfuls of money off the ground saying “this feels like enough cash to buy a website and tell people to dive into stuff, but do you think people would willingly just fucking dive into shit because I’m the one asking and I have so much fucking Clout Karma.”

Vito: Of course youfukingknuklhegGdg uratheaBamMaRgera!”

by Medium Robert March 24, 2023

Jesus Karma

When Christians want to comment and rely on the concept of karma but without all the Pagan underpinnings.

After Dave yelled at his children for no reason, he got a flat tire on the way to work. That's a little Jesus Karma right there.

by Jayzues July 24, 2012

karma

Karma is a figment of peoples' imaginations, originally used by Hindus to get out of paying debts in a present incarnation and promising to repay them in a future incarnation. Of course, the debts were never repaid, and common usage came to define karma as bad things happening to people who owed debts from past incarnations. Eventually it was expanded to include explaining why good things happened to people who seemed undeserving of having luck. They MUST HAVE done something in a past life to have such luck in this life. Common usage further expanded this meaning to the point where we alive today use karma as an excuse for people having inexplicably good or bad luck.

Karma is just another word meaning coincidence or luck that happens in any person's lifetime. Like other usurped words, the meanings are changed to suit our own purposes. If Karma existed, Western based cultures would never have taken over North and South America from their aboriginal people, using actions like giving away blankets filled with smallpox, trading beads for entire tracts of lands, providing liquor to people who had no tolerance, decimating the main food source of the plains peoples, outright murdering whole villages, and attempting genocide by sending aboriginal children to residential schools where they were physically, mentally, and sexually abused and then saying, "Oops, we screwed up! Sorry," and as penance giving harmed individuals money when clean water, arable land, and help to recover the art of child-raising were so badly needed to keep aboriginal children from needlessly committing suicide , you can bet if Karma existed white people would have been wiped off the face of this planet. Meanwhile, unlike whites, people of colour would do whatever it took to help white people survive. No, there is no such thing as karma, and we white folk should be very glad there isn't.

by rawgod June 18, 2018

KARMA KAPONE

The unholy hellspawn formed from the seed of Beelzebub steamed inside of Rhianna's oven womb for 665 days.

Bitch 1: Karma Kapone said hes gonna droo a diss track about me.

Bitch 2: Its been nice knowing ya bro

by THE INDEPENDENT VARIABLE May 22, 2018

toe karma

when something good happens to you, then your toe starts to hurt. it's the way the universe evens things out.

person 1- i got a new car, now my toe hurts
person 2- sounds like toe karma

by thatonethere April 11, 2021

Schwarma Karma

Farting and following through the morning after consuming a dodgy kebab the night before.

Oh fuck I need to change my drawers I’ve just met with a bit of schwarma karma

by Mary Unfaithful January 4, 2024

Push karma

A person who retaliates with vengeance for any real or perceived slight or wrong doing. When someone is wronged they push karma by responding with another punishable offense. These actions are performed with the intention of exacting karmic retribution but only succeed in creating more karma for oneself. An example would be to “clap back” to someone on the internet for insulting you. Responding may be necessary in some cases, but you would be pushing karma to respond in an equally insulting manner.

I would have slapped her but I’m not here to push karma.

by Chene1011 June 10, 2021