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Chester Mustache

A super thin, scraggly, tinsy-winsy pathetic attempt at a mustache. Usually found on a creepy middle-aged guy who doesnt get laid unless it comes out of his wallet. Sadly molesters usually have them (hence the name).
Rachel: OMG Richard has a chester mustache!!
Chris: dude thats effing nasty!
Rachel: i know! and he wonders why he cant get a girl friend...
by !Sexy_Time! December 26, 2009
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Shitler Mustache

The stripe/s (often resembling the shape of Adolf Hitler's mustache) left on the back of the toilet seat by an inconsiderate defecator
Phil left another shitler mustache on our toilet seat. I don't know whether he's a Nazi or just a regular asshole that doesn't bother to clean up after himself.
by bravestsirrobin June 11, 2015
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mustache monorail

one person getting railed/dry-humped/oral sex by a single unit that happens to have a hairy upper lip.
guy #1: what did you do last night?"
guy #2: i mustached monorailed some bitch all night long!
guy #3: trust me, you're welcome. do not mustache monorail my mother ever again!
guy #2: deal.....
by eatshitanddie666 May 30, 2010
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mustaching

An occupational hazard caused by using cheap staplers: almost like resistoring or telephoning, where the staples do not complete "bite" into the other side of a document, except the staples take on a more rounded form, like a handlebar mustache.
Why does this effing stapler keep on mustaching on me?
by pentozali March 2, 2011
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Irish Mustache

Similar to Red Wings however the blood from menstruation is confined to the upper lip looking like an Irishman's mustache.
Bloody hell, Kristy told me it was her time of the month so I threw back a Guinness and grew an Irish mustache.
by Kiki54312 February 15, 2009
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absence of mustache

an amazing band located in salem, oregon. it features three members Abby Miss Road, Marvin Phelps, and Humphrey Mus. this band performs all original songs, or original arrangements of somngs like the alphabet. some of their song title include "ireland", "let's all dance", and "hush lullaby". the band sometimes features accomplices in their awesome songs. some of their catchiest lyrics include...
person 1: "what time is it?"
person 2: "it's dancing time!"
person 1: you'd better check your pocket watch."
person 2: "oh no!"

and
(person 1 is up at 2 a.m. watching the television)
person 2: "this is your hush lullaby, speak not soft lips."

they are sort of the essence of awesome.
Human Being: wow, i just heard this band. they sang some songs.
Human Being, Other: oh, i know who you are talking about. absence of mustache, right?
Human Being: fosh.
by humphreymus April 21, 2009
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mustachio

a dirty bearded fag who shaves his feet and aint worked in 7 years.
peeples is a real mustachio, that piece of shit aint worked in 7 years, shave the back.
by big dick tyner March 27, 2008
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