Dutch Torpedo

The act of taking a shit in any body of water and guiding your fresh turd (henceforth referred to as the torpedo) to your friends swimming nearby, be it by natural currents or human motion. You position yourself upstream, take a squatting position and spread your butt cheeks to launch the warhead. As the guidance system locks in on your target, you then start the countdown sequence: “3, 2, 1, fire!” If your brown torpedo hits one of your friends and triggers its toxic cargo, you then shout “I’ve sunk your battleship!”

Yo Dude, What's this floating in the water? OH NO! It's a Dutch Torpedo! Swim for your life!

by Three Stripes June 10, 2014

Shining the Torpedo

Male; to masturbate. See also Buttering the Corn Cob.

My Mom hasn't talked to me since she caught me shining the torpedo last week.

by McFatty May 6, 2005

Torpedo

A fast moving dick that fucks vigorously.

Kiersten bent over the sink so Chad could Torpedo her pussy and anus then he gave her a massive creampie and cum facial!

by SlopNChop November 27, 2016

Torpedo Firecracker

a heavily submerged tampon that explodes the vagina when yanked like a stubborn lawn mower.

Oh my God, I swear my flow has NEVER been this heavy...my tampon probably transformed into some sort of torpedo firecracker that instantly blew out my vagina when you jerked the string like a rope in a tug-of-war competition.

by Tenderloin Debutante July 26, 2016

furry torpedo

Police term for a police dog, refers to their speed and shiny coat

the burglar is has been hiding in that undergrowth sarge. The dog unit will be here in a minute with a couple of furry torpedoes to flush the fucker out and bite him!

by navyblue December 6, 2006

launch a torpedo

To take a massive shit, so big that when it hits the toilet water it makes a huge kerplunk!

Man, i gotta launch a torpedo like no other!

by errrizzzzle October 17, 2007

torpedo

Incarceration Term-
An enforcer in prison/jail. Large and tough men that are assigned the role of enforcer among their race by the head of the race. If someone is disrespectful or breaks the rules, the head will send out torpedos to do some damage.
A typical minor incursion will result in a chinstrap (a heavy hit to the chin) or, for a more serious incursion, a stomp by all members of the race.

Jonny Boy was overheard talking shit about the head. He woke up in the middle of the night to the torpedos thumping on his head with socks full of batteries.

by Fumanchewd October 26, 2006