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Douchetard

Contraction. A complete moron who does things that make them out to be more than a douchebag or a retard.
A. "Man, I can't believe he sent you the wrong text message, and it was soooo awful"
B. "I can believe it. He is a douchetard".
by theguruofawesome September 26, 2010
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Doucheweed

An obnoxious, self-absorbed assfuck with a low intelligence quotient, the reputation of a two-faced backstabbing curmudgeon, and a pretentious, often God-delusional, sense of self-worth. A doucheweed almost always has an exceptionally small penis, demonstrates terrible character, expresses polarizing political views, and tells everyone the worst secrets told by "friends" in good faith. More often than not, a spoiled, pretentious rich white teenager.
Wesley: Yes, absolutely, I completely believe that the recent attempted assassinations in Arizona were an acceptable expression of political dissent.
People: God, what a doucheweed!

Wesley: (Car stopped by a police officer) Sir, what is your probable cause?
Officer: Get out of the car and get naked you little doucheweed, I am calling in the drug dogs.
Wesley: If there is weed in my car, it's Catherine's fault.
Catherine: You doucheweed, I don't do drugs! YOU DO! Don't blame YOUR drug problems on your GIRLFRIEND.
Wesley: Shut up and take the blame bitch, I am going to succeed in life at the cost of your FREEDOM.
Narcotics Officer: Weed found, both of you are going to jail.
Police Officer: That's what you get you little doucheweed! Sorry that you're dating such an ASSFUCK Catherine!
Catherine: (Sobbing) ME TOO!!!
by Kidpuncher666 January 25, 2011
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Doucheatude

The level of doucheness a person has acquired. It's a well-known fact that you must show a level of 823 doucheatude to enter any Justin Bieber concert, this may take several years to acquire this amount of doucheatude. Most start the very year they learn to talk.
Henna would have been pretty cool, if her doucheatude wasn't making her so lame.
by fapalot69 November 29, 2011
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Douchetegrity

Always doing the douchey thing even when no one is watching
Used just like Integrity except in a Douchey situatuion.

Alex side swiped that Prius and didn't leave a note. That man has impeccable douchetegrity.
by SkimBuddy March 28, 2013
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Douchetee

A goatee with no mustache
"Frank shaved the mustache off his goatee, now he's just got a douchetee"
by Ragier Kage March 28, 2015
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douchette

Anyone who has been influenced from a douche and has started to show signs of doucheism.

The son or daughter of a douche.
Sally, who hung out with Natasha the douche, started to show signs of becoming a douchette.
by pizza delivery guy October 19, 2008
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Douchette Baguette

A douche bag like chick that prefers to date douche bags.
Ali from the Bachelorette Season 6 is a Douchette Baguette.
by nrobin August 3, 2010
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