Benchnaldo

Benchnaldo was the best paid travelling bench rater in all of England during the first half of the 2022/23 season. His career peaked during the World Cup where he was benched in all knock-out games for Portugal. Sadly, his career came to an end after his owner Ten Hag kicked him out of Penchester Urinated after scoring just 1 league goal from August to January. Nowadays, Benchnaldo finds himself in a retiring home in Saudi Arabia

Sam: Someone broke into my house yesterday and stole the bench of my bench press
Josh: It must've been Benchnaldo then

by cr7isfinished October 1, 2023

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nostalgic benchmark

When one person in a group or family holds on to a symbolic memory or experience with more importance than the other people involved in that experience or memory. For this person, a nostalgic benchmark holds a reference point for a significant event that is no longer significant to others who were involved in this experience or event.

A mother and son always go to a certain restaurant to eat chicken wings. As the son grows older, he no longer likes chicken wings and has no desire to eat them, but the mother insists on going back to the restaurant, which serves the chicken wings that both of them once loved. For the mother this is a nostalgic event, but for the son, who no longer eats chicken wings or likes them, this experience of going to the restaurant to eat chicken wings no longer holds any importance or nostalgia. So, for the mother this is a nostalgic benchmark, but for the son, it has no importance, or nostalgia, it has no benchmark anymore.

by merlin's memory July 25, 2011

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Bitchtard

1) A person who is physical and mentally incompetent of keeping up with "common sense" by acting like he is 5 yrs old but in reality is much, much older. He may not know he is acting this way, but clearly the people around him do.

2) A female dog without a father. The father presumably being shot down during Vietnam.

3) A half bitch, half bastard creation.

''Listen here you incompetent bitchtard, start acting your age or you'll be feeling the full force of my boot entering your fucking skull''

by Snakeeyez187 November 28, 2002

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benchmarks

Numeric ratings of a computers performance that can, to some extent be tweaked to give the results you want. Often used in forums to 'prove' that someones chosen product is the best

l33t forum user: I added a 3000 megacycle wonderdongle to my picturemaker and my benchmark is now 2837.
another l33t forum user: wtf rotfl @ l33t forum user!11

by itsjazzy March 21, 2004

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benchmarks

Points of reference for a particular task or job. Or indicators of how well someone is doing.

Based on the days when engineers tested equipment for various vehicles on benches, and had marked the bench with reference points to show how well the device performed.

The basic benchmarks here in this job include that you perform at least 90% of the tasks in each working day, and clear at least 50% of anything left from the day before.

by D F STuckey March 23, 2004

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benchwarmin

When you have no money to spend. Pretty much the opposite of bein a "baller"

Friend 1: Hey man you gonna buy those jays when they come out?

Friend 2: Yea dude! I'm buyin 3 pairs!

Friend 1: Oh okay baller

Friend 2: How bout you? You gettin em?

Friend 1: Nahh, I have no money. I'm hella benchwarmin right now

by Priscillest October 9, 2011

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