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douchecanoe

Douchecanoe (n) -

1. A long-winded and narrow-minded douche.

2. The preferred mode of transportation for one or more douchebags.
1. "That unspecified radio shock jock can bloviate for hours without using a single shred of evidence to back his claims; he is a certifiable douchecanoe."

2. "Oh great, Brock and the gang just rolled up on the front lawn in their douchecanoe. This party is officially fucked."
by Nuanda03 August 29, 2012
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douchebangle

1. Doing the wrong thing, then later realizing that you could have gone about it in a much better fashion. Short for "douche bag angle".

2. Trying to be shifty or sleazy in a situation and blowing it only to realize later that you completely looked like an ass in the process. Regret weighs heavy.
Say a girl best described as "plain jane" that you see everyday gets a MAD makeover and like an ass you try to lay some smoothness on her only to be shot down with the realization that you knew her all along. If only you hadn't taken the douchebangle you'd probably be cozy with her right now.

Example in a sentence:

"If only he didn't try some slippery douchebangle I probably would have went to the prom with him".
by turdcutter January 13, 2008
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douchebanger

a type of mostly sucky, somewhat compulsory gathering or get-together marked by the attendance of primarily douchebags and douchebaguettes.
I'm totally pissed I have to go to this karaoke retirement party for my boss, it's going to be a total douchebanger.
by kbesque July 6, 2010
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Douchecarrot

A guy from the shore area of New Jersey with an orange tan and green hair.
Guy 1: Who's that?
Guy 2: Oh, that's just the resident douchebag.
Guy 1: You mean douchecarrot?
Douchecarrot: Bitch, I get so much pussy you have a small dick!
Guy 1: Yeah, I'm pretty sure girls masturbate with you all the time, Mr. Carrot.
by EggtasticTaco June 16, 2011
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doucheagogue

A portmanteau of demagogue and douche, meaning a rant, speech, or any sound from a douche which resembles an ill-fated, weak systematic argument.
I had to listen to Steve's doucheagogue for an hour about how he's fighting for hipster rights, and hipster marriage.
by Hasselhoff_ist_mein_Held January 30, 2012
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douchecapacitor

A person who stores up grudges and occasionally discharges them with a vengeance, much as a capacitor stores an electrical charge. Coined, as far as Google knows, on July 17, 2012 by Zandar
You have to watch it when he seems mellow and taking it in stride. He's a douchecapacitor, and one day, he'll zap you.
by Mr. Edwina July 20, 2012
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Doucheaholics

All the assholes who keep posting political definitions of Urban Dictionary
Person 1: damn 75% of Urban Dictionary in the last months is about Trump or Hilary
Person 2: Serious doucheaholics posting that stuff
by SkankHunt42.0 February 9, 2017
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