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Bartenderess

A female, one who serves beverages (typically alcoholic in nature) to patrons at a restruant or bar. A Bartenderess (serving wench) is typically gorgeous and takes in oodles of money from intoxocated men leaving tips with the hope of impressing through grandeur.
I ordered my drinks from that dropdead gorguos Bartenderess.
by DarrylBreck March 28, 2011
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Carpenter's Dick

When you wear pants that accidentally outline your package.

Similar to a "plumber's butt", but with your dick.
Frank: I hate it how Tom keeps wearing pyjama pants to work every Monday.
Julia: Yeah, it gives him a serious case of the carpenter's dick....it's distracting.
by incufilter November 14, 2016
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Electronic Calender Phobia (ECP)

Electronic Calender Phobia (ECP) is a syndrome that occurs when older employees at a company resist using calendaring software - insisting on continuing their use of paper planners.
Employee 1: Oh my gosh, why can't Sally just use our calendering system to schedule meetings. She is always calling or emailing me to see if I have availability. "Um, check the electronic calendar"
Employe 2: Oh dude, she has a serious case of Electronic Calender Phobia (ECP) - she may never get rid of her old-school paper planner.
by Stoolie November 25, 2014
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Played the Carpenter

We were totally doing missionary and he totally played the carpenter.
by FKTR September 25, 2010
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beat the bartender

A drinking game that is guaranteed to get you very drunk very fast!

The steps are very simple :
1 The drinker approaches the bar and orders a shot
drink (whiskey, bourbon, vodka, beer, etc..).
2 The drinker pays for the drink with too much money
(i.e. hand over a $5-bill for a $2 drink).
3 As the barman goes away to get change, the drinker
finishes your drink
4 When the barman returns with the change, go to step
number 1.

The game ends in a number of possible ways:

- drinker falls over (Result: Bar wins).
- barman punches drinker's lights out (Result: Draw).
- drinker gets thrown out (Result: Draw).
- bar closes (Result: Drinker wins).
person 1: "whoa man you look rough"
person 2: "yeah man i got fucking wrecked last night attempting to beat the bartender"
by greaver05 March 19, 2011
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The Bartender

Everybody's favorite person. They smile at your frown, put up with most of your shenanigans, laugh at your terrible jokes, offer the occasional ride home, and keep pouring. Respect and cherish these people. You never know how big a part of your life they'll become. Play your cards right, they might just take you home.
Friend: Did you see The Bartender?
Me: Ya, I kinda stopped breathing when she smiled at me. She definitely noticed. Oops.
by RyanFNation September 24, 2018
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the carpenter

when you bang a girl using a 4x4 as a strap-on
the carpenter hurts like hell I have a splinter in my ass
by adrain barboza April 2, 2019
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