Christian

1) someone who believes in Christ Jesus and has asked Him to come into their heart.

2) someone who isn't perfect but knows that he/she is forgiven by a God who is.

"That guy over there is a recovering drug-addict and used to abuse his spouse, but he's trying hard to change... so according to this definition, he's still a Christian. Just maybe not a great one."

by hello! =) September 16, 2008

christian rock

bland, generic lyrics aimed to brainwash youth partnered with equally bland tunes and instrumentals. it is successful only because the record executives and right wing christian leaders saw that they had enough bible-humping teenagers to make a fat profit off of.
NO ONE, and i mean NO ONE with good music taste, regardless of their religious persuasion, will be caught dead listening to christian rock, or christian music of any kind for that matter.
because, you just cant make "oh jesus, my lord and saviour, my one and only, thank you" into a good song.
it just wont happen.

cool kid: whatre you listening to?

lame wannabe christian kid: its Thank you Lord, the latest CD from God Rules, this amazing christian rock band. its really good, theyre so talented.

cool kid: go fuck yourself.

lame wannabe christian kid: its because i'm a christian, isnt it?!?

cool kid: no, its because youre an idiot. bye.

by Hannahhh January 15, 2006

christian

Was originally used as a derogatory term for those who followed the teachings of Jesus. It means "Little Christ". It was insulting for a while, until they found out that's what they were.

They were maimed and martyred for their faith in God. And they say Christians never suffered...

A pretty cool religion, if you ask me.

I am a Christian. I believe in God, and that Jesus died on the cross to atone for MY sins, and I try to follow Jesus' example. Bless those who curse you. Pray for those who persecute you.

by Doomychan May 3, 2006

Christian

People who believe a man with a beard floats in the sky and watches everything we do... And yes, Timmy, that includes you; No more masturbating.

J-Dizzle: Yo, i'm christian.
T-Dawg: That's stupid.

by Vanilla Bear 2 December 31, 2009

christian

everyday people. christians arent bible hugging, insane church going freaks. yes we have our beliefs and we have faith in God, but we are normal people just like everyone else. so for anyone who thinks christians are crazy church praying robots. look around. i bet 1 in 5 people you know are christians. so dont judge people on their religion

bob: i met this HELLA hot girl. we made out and then she told me she was christian.



friend: lets go to church ;

by hes the one July 7, 2008

Christian death metal

Forget gospel and Christian rock — death and black metal would have to be the most appropriate possible genres for a certain brand of Christianity.

Consider the story: a vengeful, jealous deity, bearing strong resemblance to many a bearded Viking god, has a half-human son (without the woman's permission) for the specific purpose of ultimately sacrificing him by means that are both excruciating and bloody.

Whereas the average human sacrifices result in something like better weather for the crops or victory in war, the ironic result of this one is that nearly all of us puny humans, too ignorant or naive to accept this Lovecraftian reality, are condemned to suffer torments inflicted by a band of fallen angels led by none other than Lucifer himself.

How fucking metal can you get? Does Buddhism even approach this?

Christian death metal lyrics in an uninformed imagination:
JESUS BLOOD BLOOD JESUS
BLOOD COMIN OUT HIS EYEBALLS
JESUS SUFFER SUFFER DIE

by Lenoxus May 3, 2009

Christian the Awesome Ninja

Christian the Awesome Ninja is an almost indescribable fictional short story written by the infamous Drew Relkcerk. The story is about a guy named Christian who kills his parents accidentaly with his ninja powers before he even knows he has them. Then he learns more about his powers as he gets older and becomes Christian the Awesome Ninja. In the story he becomes so awesome you`d think he`s the good guy but, as the story progresses he becomes corrupt and starts killing people for no reason. Then, out of a giant bolt of lightning from the sky, comes Drew! Who owns Christian and changes Christian`s name to chis. And Drew changes his own name to Drew The Savior. In order to understand this crazy-ass logic you must read the story which is impossible for alot of people because the only 4 copies of the story are here in my desk drawer.

A few excerpts from Christian the Awesome Ninja below:

1.)" Narrator: There once was a Christian named ninja

Producer: CUT! Oh, C`mon man this is like the 50th time we`ve gone over this its 'There once was a ninja named Christian!! Seriously though, you gotta work on that!!

Narrator: Oh, Sorry

Producer: Alright everybody! From the top! ACTION!"
2.) "Drew the Savior: I couldn`t have done it without help from my best friends Chuck Norris and Jesus."

3.) "Christian the Awesome Ninja: ABRA KADABRA ALEKAZAM!!!"

by blu3hat July 5, 2010