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ass-porch

The frequently expansive, region of the body that includes the Einstein-Rosen bridge connecting the rectum to the outside of the body as well as the hyperbolic saddle surface directly adjacent to the ER bridge, that together require at least half a roll of single ply toilet paper to clean after even the smallest amount of feces has traversed the region.
Dad: How’s it going in there? You fall in?
Son: Sorry dad, I wanted to make sure I cleaned the ass-porch but now I have shit all over everything. I got some on my balls, on my fingers, a few globs on the floor and even some on the mirror. I probably need a power washer to get it all squared up.
Dad: Got it! You probably both wiped back and front too much and broke off a piece that was still McConnelling in the ERB.
by dgRonbo April 12, 2021
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sweep my porch

To trim or comb one's pubic hair.
I've got a date with Stacy tonight, so I've got to sweep my porch.
by cube July 9, 2018
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Check your porch

When you know something no one is supposed to know it ; either you heard it or someome told you that, once you say check your porch , it means i got a surprise waiting for you ,I got more secrets about that subject.
A: how did you know that ? Are you stalking me?
B: check your porch bitch!!
by 1.12.9.0 April 2, 2020
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leaving the porch light on

When a swinger couple, or an otherwise cheating spouse puts out a subtle hint that their significant other isn't home and they are available to cheat.

Often used to let another cheating spouse know the coast is clear to sneak in a house and start bumping uglies for a quickie
Karen wanted to let Dan know she was ready for some dirty cheating sex so started leaving the porch light on when her husband was gone for work
by Rick2024 June 11, 2023
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If the world had a front porch

It was where my mama sat on that old swing with her crochet
It was where granddaddy taught me how to cuss and how to pray
It was where we made our own ice cream, those sultry summer nights
Where the bulldog had her puppies, and us brothers had our fights
There were many nights I'd sit right there and look out at the stars
To the sound of a distant whippoorwill or the hum of a passing car
It was where I first got up the nerve to steal me my first kiss
And it was where I learned to play guitar and pray I had the gift
If the world had a front porch like we did back then
We'd still have our problems but we'd all be friends
Treating your neighbor like he's your next of kin
Wouldn't be gone with the wind
If the world had a front porch, like we did back then
Purple hulls and pintos, I've shelled more than my share
As lightening bugs and crickets danced in the evening air
And like a beacon that old yellow bulb, it always led me home
Somehow mama always knew just when to leave it on
If the world had a front porch like we did back then
We'd still have our problems but we'd all be friends
Treating your neighbor like he's your next of kin
Wouldn't be gone with the wind
If the world had a front porch, like we did back then
Treating your neighbor like he's your next of kin
Wouldn't be gone with the wind
If the world had a front porch, like we did back then
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porch monkey

Lazy person not lazy black person im gona help take it back and reclaim it aswell as many of my freinds are doing we suggest that you do it to try to make a diffrence.
Jack was looking at his neighbors from his porch therefore Jack is a porch monkey.
by J FRO August 25, 2006
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porching

noun, verb, adjective; engaging in a sexual act on a porch, patio, deck, or any outdoor unenclosed public structure.
"I love porching fresh meat!"

"Lord Savage is totally outside porching some ugly chick."

"Hey whats that thumping noise coming from outside? Oh thats just some people porching."
by freshporch06 September 5, 2006
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