Jesus Late

A time when it is so late that even Jesus Christ would be tuckered-out.
See also: Jesus Hot, Jesus Cold, Jesus Lot, Jesus Sweet, Jesus Late, and Jesus Early

I got home so Jesus Late that my parents grounded me for 10000 years.

by not_michael October 11, 2004

Jesusland

The magical North American Christian theocracy whose citizenry have given George Bush a second term in office not because of his "accomplishments", but because of his blatant religious fundamentalism and exaggerated 1950s-era "family values." It is bordered by the Blue States and Canada to the west, north, and northeast; Mexico to the south, and the Atlantic to the east.

In Jesusland, "family values" and religious beliefs are the only things considered when voting for President. Even if the candidate is a corrupt scumbag with one hand in the oil industry's pants and the other shoving a dildo up the collective ass of the middle-class.

by Ninja Disaster November 4, 2004

Raving to Jesus

A condition usually applied to houses in the Christmas time that are completely covered in flashing lights and a Nativity scene. A house will only be raving to Jesus if the lights are flashing and a Nativity scene is present.

I couldn't sleep last winter, the house across the street was raving to Jesus.

by arcu December 5, 2010

Jesus dick

Dick so good that it heals all of your ailments

Girl: I thought you weren't going out tonight because you had a headache

Friend: I wasn't but then I hit up Ryan... He got that Jesus dick

by Dagger23 March 11, 2014

Double Pedal Jesus Metal

Heavy metal music that is considered religious because of the meaning of the lyrics. Usually awesome when played live.

Guy: Hey have you ever heard of Dear Creator?
Girl: Heck yeah! I love that double pedal Jesus metal!

by Moe-Rawr April 14, 2010

bathtub jesus

Decorative lawn ornament, popular through much of New england, where an old cast-iron bathtub is buried standing up, halfway into the ground, and a statue of Jesus is placed inside. Frequently seen near or with a lawn ball. Associated with white trash.

I saw a great bathtub jesus in Pawtucket last week.

by bkdouble October 6, 2006

jesus year

The 33rd year of your life. Time to get moving and get things done (maybe).

Next year is my Jesus year, I better stop drinking.

by agill December 24, 2008