Skip to main content

Accusing Stalker 

A type of stalker who fixates on someone, envies and sexually desires them, wishes to be them, wants to replace them, thus character assassinates them. Selects target randomly. Extremely persuasive, gifted at lying, usually has and spends prodigious energy upon target.

Habits: accuses target of being "a fraud" and "a liar" about background, achievements; projects own shortcomings on target (i.e., stalker did not finish college, thus accuses target "didn't actually attend X university, they are lying"); smear campaigns to discredit target; extreme hate language calling them "worthless", "unloved", etc., yet watches target as if number one fan. Usually from small town. Recruits and commands flying monkeys they will send on seek and destroy missions to help them against target. If caught, will try to charm and seduce catcher. If this fails they become violent.

When Accusing Stalker appears you will be called "delusional", a "liar" and a "fraud". This is because accusing stalkers suffer from a personality disorder, sometimes paired with schizophrenia, that creates the "my target will be me, so I am not me" delusion. Accusing stalkers have difficulty believing their target is not them because they wish they were the target and are ashamed of their own failures, which they believe fusion with the target will heal.

Do not pity the Accusing Stalker. This is an EXTREMELY dangerous personality. Their numbers are also on the rise.
"Jalene got off line for good last week."
"She did? Why?"
"An Accusing Stalker chick in Colorado started doing stuff. It was too much, she gave up and left the internet."
Accusing Stalker by Pinch1968 October 16, 2017
Accusing Stalker mug front
Get the Accusing Stalker mug.
See more merch

Housewife stalker

HOW DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM!?
Hym "How does this housewife stalker know who I am? That's what I want to know. Anyone? Who do I have to give a pair of cement slippers to to find out how this bitch knows who I am?"

Audience 🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤

Hym ".............."

Audience 🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤

Hym 😑 "ANSWER ME YOU DROOLING IDIOTS!!!" 🤬

Audience 🤤 🤤🤤🤤🤤"Daalloollooll *burp* Aahahahaha!" 👏👏👏 🤤

Hym 😡 "Argh! I am going to burn so many things over this!"

Iam "Just... Just try and calm down a little bit..."

Hym "YOU BE QUIET!!!" 😡 "I MEAN LOOK AT THESE IDIOTS!" 👇

Audience 🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤🤤 *Parrots something I wrote YESTERDAY*

Hym "AAARGH!!"
Housewife stalker by Hym Iam June 10, 2022

jonalker stalker 

A fugly boy that follows Little flat chested girls to get approval from very horney friends. Every hates him!! All girls run away when they see him because he is so ugly and has pimples all over his face and uses girls make up to cover them up to get the little girls attention!!
tom: omg that guy is following that little girl!
Bob: yah he must me a jonalker stalker!
jonalker stalker by Jdgt December 24, 2008

cyber stalker 

When rather than spark up a conversation with a chosen person, you choose to pop on Google and Google Whack them instead! Cuts out the long winded process of getting to know a person.

Definition : To stalk using the Web as your weapon!
Hi there, my name is Darren, whats yours? Ah hi there Maria, i'm just popping off for a moment! **Skulks off to cyber stalk**

Hey i've met this really nice girl. But this Cyber Stalker has moved in.
cyber stalker by Sandy Ritchie April 26, 2006

talk stalker 

Someone (usually you dont know them) who seems to follow you everywhere and always tries to talk to you. Often texts and leaves comments on your space.Always tries to strike up a conversation while you are talking to someone else
So why dont you like Jim?

Hes a talk stalker
talk stalker by me no wait Jesus December 8, 2007

Keith Stalker Time 

The act of awkwardly walking in a tip-toeing manner towards or behind A Keith. You must record you observations with either a high tech speddy taking camera or a video camera(found at Walmart). But be careful a Keith might spot you and attack. Keith's have a very sharp sense of smell(if you have any drugs on you, your screw) he will jack yo shit and will kick you in the VAGINA if you accidently are spotted. DONT let them spot you, or you wont be able to post your findings on youtube or Tosh.0.
Jacdk: ITS KEITH STALKER TIME!!!!

Sidney: I am on the Path of the 77 year old keith in its natural habbitat....

Jack: Oh shiiitttttt did you stash the pot at your house?!

Sidney: No, i put it in your back pocket

Jack: FUUUU-

2 days later...

Sidney: Im sorry mister and misses Holly.... Jack was burtaly kicked in the VAGINA and he died.

Luckly i saved the weed.

anti-stalker 

n. adj. one who pretends to not stalk while in the act of stalking.
"He had the nerve to say he didn't know this was my house. He's such an anti-stalker"
anti-stalker by TheBestWickedWitch December 27, 2011