Aidan Murphy

Aidan Murphy is the kindest, sweetest person you’ll ever meet, he’s popular amongst his friends and he probably is best friends with a girl. He’s amazing at art and is wickedly talented when it comes to drawing, he’s funny as fuck and cool for the most part, but underneath that layer of happiness is a shy, quiet, introvert that hates talking to new people and is bad at comforting them. However, we all love Aidan, he’s a charmer

Aidan Murphy listens to the birds singing and pulls his hood down further over his ears

by Rick dearie October 22, 2018

A Murphy

Winning the cumulative prize in a work office pool while claiming to only be a porn fluffer during college for the money. Is best known from the Buns of Steel videos. Sings impromptu lyrics to Beast of Burden chorus by The Rolling Stones like a champion.

Did you hear about the guy at work that won? He pulled A Murphy.

by Fat Brown Pandas October 29, 2018

Murphy

The plumpest, most lazy, and most wrinkly Bulldog. If he lays down, he's out like a light ZzZzZz. He has the loudest snore known to man and can cause a mini earthquake in your bedroom. Don't take Murphy to a cabin by a mountain cause his snoring will be sure to create a full on avalanche. After one drink of water be ready to put up the "wet floor sign" because where ever he goes after a sip of water will surly be soaked. Among Murphy's favorite things include: sleeping, eating, snorting, and drooling. Murphy is the poster child for Murphy's Law because when he's left alone something will go wrong.

Coworker: Wanna get something to eat after work?

Me: No, sorry I can't. Murphy has been alone for too long.

Coworker: What could possibly go wrong?

Me: Everything... You just jinxed it. I have to get home before I'm evicted for noise complaints.

Coworker: Oh shit sorry.. Noise complaints?

Me: Murph snores like a fucking Wooly Walrus Mammoth. I. HAVE. TO. GO.

by LDizzle10 December 19, 2018

Murphy's Law of "Junk"

"You can hold onto something for decades, and neither you nor anyone else will ever have a use for it, but then just as soon as you throw it out, either you will suddenly need it for something, or --- even more 'painful' --- **someone else** will come to you and humbly ask, 'Do you happen to have an extra ___?'" Rrrrrggggghhhhh----!!!

I'd had a couple of old 55-gallon oil-drums stashed in da garage for da past thirty years --- my grampa had given 'em to me when he and Gram were downsizing to move into an assisted-living apartment --- and they'd just sat there and gathered dust in da corner all that time. But then just two days --- TWO STINKIN' DAYS!! --- after I'd sent 'em to da crusher for recycling, a low-income neighbor dropped by and asked me if he could have them to use as burn-barrels --- guess dat was a classic case of Murphy's Law of "Junk" at work!!

by QuacksO July 24, 2018

Jasper Murphy

Sexiest man in raleigh hands down he is gorgeous and everyone lowkey hates him.

“Jasper Murphy is a sexy bitch”

by raleighguide69 July 27, 2018

Murphy's Law of Internet-Speed

"The 'speed' of the Internet --- i.e., how long web-pages take to 'load' and/or respond to you mouse-clicks --- will be in direct inverse proportion to how urgently you need to view the desired material; the connection will be even slower at times there's someone else waiting for you who's also in a hurry.

My buddy needed me to hastily Google engine-bolt-torquing specs during an emergency-repair task he was struggling to get done before a downpour, but the Web was "slower dan molasses runnin' uphill in da wintertime" --- it was a classic "Murphy's Law of Internet-Speed" scenario!

by QuacksO July 28, 2018

Murphy's Law Of Windshield-Damage

"You can leave a pitted/abraded/scratched/bubbled/discolored windshield in your car till 0%!$@&# Doomsday and it will never get hit, but then just as soon as you actually REPLACE said "ancient" glass wif a brand new one, THAT'S when you'll get a bleepin' BIG OL' PEBBLE tossed up by a passing vehicle, and star-crack your nice shiny-fresh windshield all to Hell!"

After several years I eventually got sick and tired of all da misty triplex-haze on my car's original-from-the-factory windshield, and so I finally replaced it --- wouldn't you know that the VERY NEXT DAY it got a huge crack in it after a rock got thrown up by the wheel of a passing dump-truck! Ahhhhrrrggggghhhhh... classic case of Murphy's Law Of Windshield-Damage, I guess!!

by QuacksO July 31, 2018