the buffalo theory

A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And, when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we all know, kills brain cells, but naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine!

That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers.

The buffalo theory is concrete proof that getting drunk is good for your intelligence

by Raziel February 4, 2004

coma theory

A fan theory that the plot of a tv show/movie/video game is actually all a dream by the main character, most likely because of a coma. Alternately all or most characters are really dead or in hell or whatever sounds edgy. The most lame and overused of all fantheories, no one particularly cares for it. This however does not stop tweens from posting their "original" fan theory on every relevant message board they know anyway.

Google the name of your favourite series + "coma theory", there's your example.

by hagueharry January 21, 2014

dobler dahmer theory

A theory stating that if two people are into each other, a big romantic gesture works, but if one person isn't into the other, the same gesture comes off serial killer crazy.

Look, there's a fine line between love and insanity. It's the dobler dahmer theory.

by Yangarang June 19, 2016

Carpenter Theory

When you get someone 'hammered' and you 'nail' them.

I think I'm going to use the Carpenter Theory tonight on Megan.

by Anonymous33745 March 25, 2010

TheOdd1sOut

An animator on Youtube that tells his life stories, but animates it, and posts it on Youtube. Lives in Tuscon, Arizona, which is only like where half of the global influence of telling stories in animations comes from. He also worked at Sooubway before becoming a Youtuber.

TheOdd1sOut no longer works at Sooubway

by TheGEICOgecko November 21, 2018

unified field theory

1) an as-yet-undiscovered theory unifying many scientific field theories into one understanding of how the universe operates

2) something unattainable, much as finding an actual unified field theory has baffled scientists for decades

Einstein spent the last two decades of his life trying to develop a unified field theory.
-------
Person 1: John keeps asking Sarah out, but she's not biting.
Person B: She's his unified field theory. Ain't gonna happen.

by ChuckChaser69 August 17, 2008

theory of everything

Theory of Everything (ToE) is the point in quantum theory Level 4 where the entire data set of everything ever known to exist is resolved in a simple equation: Life = Zero or One (depending on the size of your shaft)

I was bummed out when I my wife died, but then I read about Theory of Everything in hustler magazine.

by Dr. Simulacra October 14, 2013