Jesus take the wheel

When things go awry. When you can no longer take whats happening around you so you ask for the higher power Jesus to take the wheel.

Oh i just cant take this anymore Jesus take the wheel!

by Toffeebarz February 27, 2014

jesus handle

The handle above the windows in most cars, so called for the propensity of people to shout "Oh Jesus!" while clutching it in mortal terror at the driver's skill level or sanity.

Also known as an oh shit handle.

My aunt is such a terrible driver. Whenever she drives everyone clings to their jesus handles.

by Ko'rhyan March 26, 2009

RN jesus

Usually associated with video games,
RNJesus is the deity of RNG. (random number generators)

When the outcome of a certain scenario could be determined by a random factor most players can do nothing except pray to RNJesus.

(1) "I was playing Hearthstone and the guy had 3 hp so I prayed to RN jesus and played mad bomber, my prayers were answered and I won"
(2) "I was playing first round T-side running and spamming my glock, RN jesus gave me two headshots"

by Velen August 8, 2016

jesussy

its jesus but sussy

“im religous but im also jesussy”

by lukaslube December 31, 2021

Maria Jesus

Maaria Jesus is the most amazing person youll ever meet, and one of the few people that will stay with you no matter what. Shes is a gorgeous girl who by first glance looks kinda bitchy but as you get to know her that thought gets out of your head, very close to her family and friend members so if you do anything to them a Maria Jesus will fuck you up.

-Omg did you see what Maria Jesus did to the boy yesterday.
-Yeah i saw he got fucked up.
- Basically he staryed talking shit about her family

by larita.patitas October 25, 2020

Mach Jesus

Something traveling above a "reasonable speed"

My and my buddy went on a beer run last night driving at Mach Jesus in his 2nd gen dodge

by SomeRedneck69 June 10, 2021

Cheeto Jesus

Nickname for President Trump

So glad Cheeto Jesus keeps MAGA! *facepalm*

by Toprymin February 8, 2017