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instructions unclear

A phrase said when either the instructions were vague or not understood. Usually followed by getting one's genitals stuck in household appliances.
Instructions: To get your witchmax-2000 broomstick up and running you must sacrifice 1 virgin(whose first name must start with an 'X') on an altar which has the shape of the map of Argentina while reading the bible backwards in an Australian accent while writing the solution of three complex differential equations on the altar with a black bpelikan/b marker.
Once complete, proceed with soaking the bat feathers in the virgin blood and your good to go.

User: Instructions unclear, got dick stuck in the toaster. Help..?
by SirBarks alot July 14, 2016
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enclosed instruction book

What you check out when you need instructions on how to get through the hotels.
"If you need instructions on how to get through the hotels, check out the enclosed instruction book."
by Justin Thorson September 10, 2008
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basic instruction

a jigger of well bourbon, split on the counter, wiped up with a rag, wrung out over a handful of ice from the salad bowl
I asked the bartender from a basic instruction and he threw me out of the bar
by i am not the one who is so far December 28, 2010
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instruction manual

A short publication that would have saved you a lot of time if you bothered to read it. However, reading an instruction manual before attempting to assemble/use the product with which it came is a sure sign of mental and physical weakness.

Manuals come free with purchases of self-assembly furniture, electronic products, children’s toys and many, many other products.
Some of these products are so simple to use, (eg. A padlock) that a 55 page, multi-lingual, fully referenced brochure doesn’t really seem necessary

When writing an instruction manual, follow these simple rules and you can’t fail;

1. Make the pages from stiff, shiny paper so that it’ll only stay open at the right page with the help of a rock, a toolbox and a dining room table positioned on each corner.

2. Make an extensive ‘Contents Page’ using the smallest font available and ensuring that you number the chapters, sections and sub-sections. Do this even if you only have 3 pages.

3. If applicable, include an illustration of the parts the buyer SHOULD have received and make sure this includes a picture of the manual itself.

4. When you reach the English chapter, don’t be tempted to waste money on a translator, as you can simply guess most English words and make up the rest as you go along.

5. Be sure to include diagrammatical information where appropriate – get a four year old child to help you with the drawings.

6. Make the manual's cover attractive to women so that they can sit on their comfy sofas and shout directions at their husband/boyfriend when they are doing perfectly well with superior male intuition (and brute force)
The instruction manual was written in total gibberish.
The instruction manual's glossary section was extremely useful.

Jack: Would you like to learn how your phone works in Arabic?
Jill: Oh Yes Please!
Jack: Here you are, it starts on page 205.
by Jimstock July 16, 2008
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Instructions were unclear

A common phrase said by one after they gave instructions, usually followed by an impossible consequence for not following the instructions correctly.
*How To Video's Comment Section*

"Instructions were unclear, my dick is stuck in a ceiling fan."
by Hunter512 September 16, 2014
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weapon of math instruction

by spanky February 5, 2004
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Weapons of Math Instruction

Your basic tools for teaching math: Protractor, ruler, compass, etc.
They forced the man off the plane because he said he was carrying weapons of math instruction.
by Rodney Basil December 14, 2003
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