The Manlet Detection Agency is a crucial government entity that seeks to, using the long arm of the law, squash the derisory emergence of a pint-sized manlet insurgency. The brave men and women of the Manlet Detection Agency work tirelessly to protect the community from the ever-present threat of a manlet uprising by relentlessly detecting manlets both online and irl. Suspected manlets are detained and then searched and stripped of any contraband like height boosting insoles and high heels. Subsequently the potential Little Criminals are meticulously measured and, if confirmed to be shorter than 5ft10 and therefore a soon-to-be prison wife manlet, the stunted manlets are arrested on the spot. Every lacking inch below 5ft10 is known to be reflected by an additional ten-year prison term in the girlish manlet's well-deserved sentence, which will be imposed upon the puny manlet by a fuming judge as the microscopic manlet boy stands small in a courtroom atop of his towering attorney's outstretched palm securely shackled by a string of dental floss.
Hey, isn't that the minuscule turbo-manlet Kevin Hart getting hemmed up by a heroic group of mobile task force agents from the Manlet Detection Agency? It sure is. That diminutively petite and astronomically effeminate sissy manlet is going to be sentenced to a billion years in the penitentiary. Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator August 25, 2024
Manlets (males shorter than 5ft10) blown the fuck out. Employed in recognition or mockery of a particularly devastating humiliation or defeat, suffered by a petite and effeminate sissy manlet boy. Frequently used online because the silly manlet's already lowly existence is constantly blighted by merited mortification due to his comical manletism and self-evident Napoleon complex.
Did you know that manlets face a 90%+ rejection rate from women and aren't even allowed to donate sperm? Hahahahaha! Eternally, brutally and utterly manlets BTFO!
by ManletDepreciator August 12, 2024
A mentally masochistic and excessively ego-driven manlet boy (a male shorter than 5ft10), who is extremely prone to magical thinking and manlet rage. The term was coined by Elliot "The Supreme Gentleman" Rodger (aptly named The Virgin Killer by the media) during his unsurprisingly unsuccessful period of residence in Isla Vista, California while senselessly attending Santa Barbara City College and first published in mortifying videos with hilarious titles such as: "Why do girls hate me so much", "Life is so unfair because girls don't want me", "My reaction to seeing a young couple at the beach, Envy" on his now defunct YouTube channel and in his manlet manifesto "My Twisted World". In a highly amusing manifestation of manlet mathematics and guy height, Elliot "Tall Tales" Rodger liked to claim that he was 5ft10, his shamefully stunted truthful height being around 5ft6. Evidently afflicted with a Napoleon complex deluxe, unquestionably suffering from Napoleon complex psychosis and after having been bullied throughout all of his lowly life for being a Little Napoleon, rejected by every women in southern California, wasting thousands of dollars on lottery tickets (like the money-hungry dwarf that he was) and fracturing his delicate, little ankle in a fruitless fight against a group of laughing manmores, it was only a matter of time before the queen of manletism finally snapped and embarked on his abominable "Day of Retribution". Short people got no reason.
Natalie: Why is that garden gnome over there wearing Gucci sunglasses and a Hugo Boss shirt? Erin: Supreme gentleman manlet detected. Let's throw our high heels at him and see if he goes Bagel Boss Manlet on us! Natalie: Manlets BTFO. Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator September 18, 2024
The matriculated manlet is a silly, little manlet boy who is senselessly enrolled at a college or university. Here the completely delusional and diminutively dwarfed Oompa Loompa wastes his time (when not working shifts at the chocolate factory) by furiously staring at all the tall and happy couples who walk around the campus like the bitter and envious peewee manlet that he is, crying all alone in the girl's bathroom after being asked by campus security if he was there for Take Your Daughter to Work Day and if he had lost his daddy and by being stuffed into backpacks, lockers, trashcans, lunchboxes, drawers, toilets, empty cigarette packs, pencil cases and used condoms like the inherently effeminate and minusculely malformed midget manlet bully magnet that he was always destined to be. When not being examined microscopically while standing on a petri dish by horrified microbiology students, the matriculated manlet is free to indulge in his true passions of girlishly practicing his bumbling cheerdance routine in an effort to become the captain of the local manlet football cheer squad and undergoing a brutal hazing ritual in order to join the only fraternity that would accept him, the Sigma Beta Manlet, by engaging in a fight to the death against fourteen other oiled up, bikini-clad midgets in an electrified bird cage.
Emma: Hey, why is that matriculated manlet tearfully ranting about women while sitting in his BMW in the parking lot over there? I could barely understand his manletspeak. Why all of the manlet rage? Isabella: He approached me, introduced himself as the supreme gentleman and brusquely told me to get in his car so that I can delight in his fabulousness and magnificence. I simply looked down at him and laughingly called him a petite and utterly insignificant little manlet fairy and then he just ran away crying to his Manletmobile. Emma: Manlets, when will they learn?
by ManletDepreciator September 16, 2024
The martial arts manlet is a minuscule and utterly insignificant manlet, who has, in an absolutely futile attempt at overcoming his insurmountably devastating manletism, hilariously decided that in order to bolster his notoriously fragile self-esteem and in a laughably delusional effort at competing with the towering manmores that terrify him, he should pursue an ill-fated career in martial arts. Closely related to the stubby and microscopic, gym coping manlet pit dweller, the overcompensating martial arts manlet can often be found engaging in mortifying public catfights with other martial arts manlets, throwing a hissy fit after being bullied by other children or crying bitter tears of manlet rage after having once again been soundly and easily defeated by a laughing manmore. Willfully ignorant of the plainly obvious truth that no amount of time wasted by bodybuilding or sparring will change the fact that he is a dwarfishly stunted, elflike and inherently effeminate runt of a sissy manlet boy who would be the belle of the ball in a women's prison, the Napoleon complex-driven martial arts manlet personifies peak manletism.
Lol, why is that spandex wearing turbo-manlet twirling around beneath that table lamp while blasting Short People over there? I think the silly martial arts manlet is shadow-boxing. Eye of the Manlet. Hahahahaha!
by ManletDepreciator August 21, 2024
The military manlet is an overcompensating manlet boy who, in a fit of Napoleon complex-induced insanity, has signed up for active duty with the United States Armed Forces. Here the useless and effeminate manlets are generally used as cannon fodder when deployed in the absurd spectacle known as the manlet wave attack tactic, but can also be traded as war brides, serve as portable human shields or can be used as an emergency fortification when stacked up as a barricade in lieu of sandbags. The military manlet is always keen to raise the morale of the actual soldiers in his platoon by donning an Oompa Loompa costume and dancing a merry jig atop a mess hall table as the surrounding military manlets clap in unison while dancing in a circle like the fairies that they are and all the manmores pelt him with height boosting insoles. As an encore Manletlyn Monroe performs smash hits such as "High Heels Are A Manlets Best Friend" and "Bye Bye Masculinity" to further entertain the troops.
Why is that pantsed military manlet lying face down in the mud over there? The silly sissy manlet broke one of his high heels while prancing around on the obstacle course and threw a hissy fit, so the real soldiers just left him there. Never leave a man behind - that obviously doesn't apply to manlets.
by ManletDepreciator August 22, 2024
A grotesquely gnomish gaggle of ganged-up, overcompensating turbo-manlets who have, in a childish, desperate and doomed attempt at overcoming their crippling manletism, decided to form a midget gang. Once a diminutively dwarfed new recruit has been sexed-into the gang, it is mandatory for him to participate in typical gang activities, for example: tagging up turf by spray-painting garden gnomes at knee height onto garbage cans and pet doors, drinking Tall Boys and huffing Jenkem, prancing around naked except for high heels and assless chaps in their hobbit-hole of a gang hideout while towel snapping each other's posteriors in an effort to toughen themselves up, telling deeply embarrassing tall tales about how they used to be the biggest kid in preschool, injecting themselves with stolen bovine somatotropin in a futile and injudicious bid at escaping their inevitable fate of becoming a prison wife manlet once caught by the law and incarcerated and frantically praying in front of the countless Randy Newman posters adorning the walls of the manlet pit in their hobbit-hole gang hideout while repetitively reciting the lyrics of their favorite song Short People due to their shared obsession with the delusional hope of being blessed with an adult-onset growth spurt by their beloved God and hero Saint Newman.
Jessica: Lol, why are there a bunch of garden gnomes standing on the corner over there? Olivia: It's just a Short People manlet gang. Here, take my magnifying glass and have a closer look. Can you see that they got little hands, little eyes, that they walk around tellin' great big lies? They got little noses and tiny little teeth. Unsurprisingly they wear platform shoes on their nasty, little feet. Jessica: Oh yeah, they got little baby legs and they stand so low - I'd have to pick one of them up just to say hello! Olivia: Well, I don't want no short people 'round here. Jessica: Short people got no reason.
by ManletDepreciator September 11, 2024