hip-hop
A set of attitudes and behaviors originating in the stark, deprived inner-city ghettos and inexplicably adopted by middle-class suburban teens. Hip-hop represents resourcefulness and ingenuity in the face of unspeakable material and intellectual poverty:
1. Graffiti: Can't afford real art supplies? Spray paint someone else's property! Dat shit be da bomb!
2. Break dancing: Can't afford a place to dance? Flatten a cardboard box and flop around on the sidewalk! Dem pedestrians be laughing wit you, not at you homie!
3. Rapping/Mcing: Can't afford a musical instrument or too lazy to learn how play? Shout some rapid-fire rhymes. Extra points awarded for butchering the english language. Yo yo dem badass rhymes gots da Man afeard of da revolution!
4. DJing: Can't afford to put together a band or too lazy to write your own music? Find someone else's work on vinyl and move it back and forth on a fancy turntable. Dat skritch-skratch be musical genius!
Your hip-hop credibility will be enhanced by rejecting the strides made in your behalf by the civil rights movement. Don't apply for scholarships; drop out of school. Fail to learn proper English, thereby ensuring that you'll never qualify for a decent job. Try never to read any books. Reject any activity that requires hard work or discipline.
Show the world you're a hip-hopper by wearing garish, impractical, cheap-knock-off clothing and jewelry that mimics rap stars and basketball players. Make sure you look like a complete fool when you're out in general society.
Finally, don't bother to learn about anything the world has to offer outside your neighborhood. Dat shit all be plastic, an you gots ta keep it real!
1. Graffiti: Can't afford real art supplies? Spray paint someone else's property! Dat shit be da bomb!
2. Break dancing: Can't afford a place to dance? Flatten a cardboard box and flop around on the sidewalk! Dem pedestrians be laughing wit you, not at you homie!
3. Rapping/Mcing: Can't afford a musical instrument or too lazy to learn how play? Shout some rapid-fire rhymes. Extra points awarded for butchering the english language. Yo yo dem badass rhymes gots da Man afeard of da revolution!
4. DJing: Can't afford to put together a band or too lazy to write your own music? Find someone else's work on vinyl and move it back and forth on a fancy turntable. Dat skritch-skratch be musical genius!
Your hip-hop credibility will be enhanced by rejecting the strides made in your behalf by the civil rights movement. Don't apply for scholarships; drop out of school. Fail to learn proper English, thereby ensuring that you'll never qualify for a decent job. Try never to read any books. Reject any activity that requires hard work or discipline.
Show the world you're a hip-hopper by wearing garish, impractical, cheap-knock-off clothing and jewelry that mimics rap stars and basketball players. Make sure you look like a complete fool when you're out in general society.
Finally, don't bother to learn about anything the world has to offer outside your neighborhood. Dat shit all be plastic, an you gots ta keep it real!
Le'Rhonda don't need no education. She don't need no job. She be keepin it real. Hip-hop be her life.
hip-hop by Alan Keyes August 18, 2004
Get the hip-hop mug.