Turf Goblin

A father figure who is up-tight about his yard and grass.

Man my dad is such a turf goblin.

by BryceisCrispy May 10, 2020

The Key Goblin

Getting got by The Key Goblin, is a common phenomena where a person puts down a small object (keys, remote or phone) to do a quick task only to come back and be incapable of finding the object

Person 1: I got up to go to the bathroom and now i cant find where i put my keys
Person 2: Sounds like the key goblin got you
Person 1: Fucking Key goblin

by Crack Dealer2255 December 20, 2021

Goblin Surprise

Alcohol induced event when a man thinks he picked up a hot girl in a dark club with makeup and a nice dress on, has sex that night, then the next morning wakes up to find she is a goblin looking creature.

James tells Glen, "Hey man did you see that hot Asian bartender Clint picked up last night?" Glen, "Yeah she was cute!" James, "Well Clint woke up in the morning and had a Goblin Surprise, she looked like Yoda from Starwars!"

by TuckDCconnect January 5, 2011

Porn Goblin

Someone who watches porn a lot, too much in some cases. A porn goblin may be secretive about their porn watching habits others may be open about it.

Fred "I don't watch that much porn!"
Bob "Don't lie Fred we all know you're a porn goblin"

by secretslut October 17, 2013

Snatch Goblin

A derogatory term for a heterosexual male or a homosexual female. Referring to one who spends more time in the depths of a vaginal abyss rather than out, interacting, in the real world.

Jenna: "Hey, where's David?"
Tom: "Oh, he's stuck between Kylie's thighs again."
Jenna: "Oh my god, he is such a snatch goblin."
Tom: "True that."

by oogabooga456 May 22, 2013

Starbucks goblin

The most basic of thots.

Jessica is such a fucking Starbucks Goblin.

by BUMGLESHWUMGLE September 6, 2019

Ass Goblin

An Ass Goblin is used to describe a person who you encounter and don't know much about, but you know "I would hate to be them". A person can be an Ass Goblin for many reasons such as a Karen yelling at the cashier because her order was wrong or a crackhead asking for money outside of the gas station. An Ass Goblin is a very unpleasant person, it could be by actions, looks, or general stupidity. Ass Goblins are a true enemy of the public and should be avoided at all costs.

Freind 1: When I went to the gas station earlier everyone there was an Ass Goblin.
Freind 2: What where they doing?
Freind 1: There was this fat smelly guy buying four 2-liters of soda in front of me, then the cashier put my money on the wrong pump, and when I went back in a crackhead asked if I would get alcohol in exchange for a "good time".
Freind 2: Damn, bro where was that, because I'm never going there.

by Anonymous7232826 September 11, 2022