Sperm Whale

A promiscuous, obese woman.

Jeremy bagged himself a Sperm Whale last night at Jared's party.

by NagathaChristie August 4, 2018

sperm-poop

The result of sperm being contained in a human anus and retrieving far to quickly, resulting in an explosive blow containing a stew composed of excrements and seamen.

Finished up... went to the bathroom.. I came back and she said we had a problem... sperm-poop!

by snarf dragon September 20, 2014

Sperm Chips

The act of ejaculating on your partner's back in a below freezing temperature environment. Whereupon the frozen semen is peeled off and fed to same partner.

"The wife and I are going ice fishing this weekend."
"Are you sure? It get's cold out there."
"Of course, mid-January is sperm chips season!"

by Oh God, why? June 17, 2012

sperm-sealed

When the last belated dribbles of cum finally make it out of the urethra, and seal the tip of the penis, or otherwise. Can cause a slight sharp pain in the penis if not thwarted before urination.

Fred masturbated before bed, then later woke up to pee. He hadn't realized that he was sperm-sealed, and was painfully pulled from his drowsiness when nothing immediately came out.

by woodsy-likes-wood April 19, 2014

Sperm Sandwich

A sperm sandwich is the act of a man ejaculating between a woman's tits and then eating it. (Spread is optional).

Man 1: Duuude I totally Sperm Sandwiched your sister last night.

Man 2: I wouldnt mind spreading some butter between her slices.

Man 1: Dude this is your sister you sick bastard

Man 2: Yeh but she's well slack.

by Sam and Paddy August 24, 2009

sperm spear

big long schlong that sprays there baby yogurt all over the bitches face.

dan: man christy came to work today looking like shit
dylan: oh yea, it looks like she got leaked on by sperm spear.

by jaco21 April 26, 2011

sperm-off

When two guys engage in double vaginal with the goal of knocking up the girl. Winner is the guy that winds up knocking her up with the loser having to suck him off.

Jessica: I'm still a little sore from that sperm-off last night
Kate: Which guy do you think will win?
Jessica: Well I would love to have Steve's baby in me, but it would also be so hot to watch him suck off Mike.

by IshtarsSon July 23, 2023