Thai Massage

A very nice massage, usually given with copious amounts of oil.

Once you strip naked in front of a 17 year old thai masseus, you lay down on a bed where she proceeds to give you the best massage of your life.

Towards the end of the massage, you'll be prompted to receive a "sexy massage". At this point she'll negotiate a price with you, ranging from 12$-15$. keep in mind, this is Thailand where its perfectly legal to sleep with a 12 year old but deathly illegal to smoke marijuana.

After the negotiations are complete, you'll get the best damn fucking handjob ever.

Boyfriend: Hey babe, can you give me a Thai Massage?

Girlfriend: Gross no i wont fulfill your sick Asian fantasies..

by redzone1 March 28, 2009

messege

Misspelling of 'message.' Get it right.

messege. INVALID.

by your mother's cat December 31, 2013

Sext messaging

Like phone sex, but with text messaging

"JoJo Puppysnatch's cell bill was outrageous in March of 05 thanks to endless sext messaging sessions."

by Chris94 August 1, 2006

tonsil massage

When the male sex organ is used to massage the tonsils or throat of the opposing partner.

Jane said she had a sore throat, so I offered her a tonsil massage.

by Shawnster172 January 29, 2007

somatic massage

A "new age" form of massage in which women can fool themselves into thinking touching other men's Penises is not cheating when it fact it clearly is. If you are getting paid for this it becomes a euphemism for prostitution.

"Hey! My wife is taking classes in Somatic Massage and thinks it's not cheating even though she jerked off three dudes"

"Woo-Hoo! I hope she got a $3000 tip for doing that!!!"

by Redd Johnson May 13, 2014

Marion Massage

The act of a man massaging a woman's butthole until a turd falls out. The poop is then transferred to the woman's hand, and then the woman massages it into the man's butthole. Named after Marion, Ohio.

Steve: So what'd you and Lexie do last night?
Jim: Marion Massage
Steve: Lucky guy!

by convojake February 23, 2011

Mexican massage

A massage without using ones hands.

Lisa: "Did you give her a Mexican massage?"
Buddy: "I am a gentleman!"

by Costa Maya Chick December 12, 2008