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safety goggles

When one purposely gets drunk enough to attain the condition of beer goggles in order to survive an otherwise embarrassing sexual encounter with somebody who is physically unattractive.
Tom's evening was nearly ruined when his friends forced him to play wingman with the fat ugly broad who was cockblocking and impeding their chances of scoring it with her more attractive companions. Fortunately, he utilized his wits and before he could take one for the team, he downed several bottles of Dogfish Head 90 Minute India Pale Ale, then nailed the bitch while his inebriated senses mistook her for a Jessica Alba lookalike and enjoyed every minute of it. When he was done, he got dressed and got out while still drunk, otherwise he could have passed out and woken up moments later sober and with the poor man's Rosie O'Donnell in bed with him. Thus, his safety goggles did work after all.
by Terminus_Est June 8, 2011
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safety wipe

when you wipe your ass even though you haven't taken a shit recently--just to make sure it's all clean and good down there. A safety wipe is also the cleanest, most effective way to scratch your anus.
When Amy invited Bob back to her place, he did a safety wipe in her bathroom, in case she ended up going down on him.
by ducksRpeople2 September 13, 2011
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Related Words

Salty Mufin

A sex act wherein one party will consume the ejaculate of the other after it has been spread over baked goods.
Last night I tried eating a salty mufin and found it surprisingly enjoyable.
by SAPangolin August 13, 2015
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Salty Robson

A cum-soaked sock (often mutiple use) that has been forgotten and left to ferment
My left shoe feels funny . . . Fuck, I'm wearing a Salty Robson.
by turtle_pornography June 1, 2016
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Captain Salty Tea-biscuits

"Captain Salty Tea-biscuits" is what you call a Shrimp Boat Captain that is a total perv and is so high on cocaine he doesn't realized he just had his way with and Gandolphed his own father.Yeah,in the butt.
Wow! I can't believe Ron went all "Captain Salty Tea-biscuits" on his dad.Did he really Gandolph him too?
by J to the V to the L August 29, 2012
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qR_Salty

qR_Salty Also known short as “Laviia” is a past cult member of CYX aka “CAEDORYX”. She became a meme among every dude in telegram after distributing her so called videos. In November 2021, She left telegram and no one knows where she went.
Azrael: hey qr_salty please make me a fansign

qR_Salty: no little boy, fuck off
by TelegramMaster March 6, 2022
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Low Sodium Salty

Synonymous with "low key salty", Low sodium salty describes the act of being angry/pissed/upset but to a lesser or more subtle degree.
"I ate the last cookie and Aaron was being low sodium salty about it..."
"Aisa was being low sodium salty about having to pay the bills"
by martelldesu June 13, 2016
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