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jerk and poop

The art of masturbating while taking a poop. Too do so you must be ready to poop and ejaculate at the said time simultaneously.
I had a nice jerk and poop the other day.
by Juiceton hymen August 15, 2017
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jerk session

When you're sitting in front of your computer with PornHub open and prepare the jerk off during your porn session.

Can also be used to describe a few friends getting together to study, work or do some non-sexual group activity. The implication is that they are gay, in a funny way, therefore using the term "jerk session."
Tony: I have to call you back, I'm in the middle of a jerk session.

Michael: Hey guys, are you free later, I might come by?
Mat: Yes, what's on your mind I'm with Tom here.
Michael: I'm thinking we do a quick jerk session.
by Dakrisht August 1, 2016
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Kamakazi Jerk

When you start jerking off right after you call your Mom, Dad, Brother, Sister, or Stepsister comes into the room and try to finish.
How did you lose your virginity? I tried to kamakazi jerk and my stepsister came in.
by StarryNick June 26, 2019
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smirk jerk

An person who frequently fakes a smile with an arrogant, smug attitude.
Rachel is such a smirk jerk! She always gives me that same smug look every time I screw something up.
by zeus64 April 12, 2011
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The National Jerk

Someone so hated by the nation that he could possibly be the jerk of the nation.

Some person who is so much of a jerk that they could represent the nation in a competiton to determine the worlds biggest jerk.
"So hated by the nation.. they dubbed him - The National Jerk"

"Wow man.. that guy was a national jerk.."

Phone Call: "Man what an asshole... that guy's going to nationals..."
by Jezzakanezza April 26, 2011
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desk jerk

The act of masturbating at your desk when nobody is around; masturbation after everyone has left work for the day. Excrements are usually caught by a fast-food napkin or nearby trash can.
Frustrated with a project, I decided to knock out a desk jerk one night I was working late.
by heavyburtation April 27, 2011
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Cloud-Jerking

The act of jerking off to memory rather than pornographic material.
Jared: man, ever since net neutrality was appealed, I've been Cloud-Jerking to children all day.
Bob: That's sick, as a responsible citizen, I will notify police of your actions.
Jared: Bro, I was just playing, I was jerking off to the illegal pornography on my laptop.
Bob: reeeeeeeeeeeeeee

*epilepsy*
by BlurryMcFlurry March 13, 2018
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