A Howard is a completely unimpressive collection of traits that consumes its own waste. While some references to Howard as a first or last name have been used in the past, all Howard’s have their origins from a single mutated cell of primordial Fatlardagin sperm.
The Mississippi strain of the Howard is the most unremarkable and subhuman subspecies of the Howards and usually caught at night on trail cam performing beastiality on white tail deer.
Mississippi Howard’s can be identified easily by their slowed speech, irregular cranium shape and a under developed penis that resembles a small tootsie roll, amazingly this tiny appendage is black no matter skin color.
The first example studied by Harvard professors was in 1846 and was found at the Barnum and Bailey Circus as a side show for a 5 cent piece
Amazingly the Mississippi Howard has continued to regress in all aspects.
Take the tootsie roll shaped penis, as disgusting as this sounds it has regressed from 81 mm (3.18”) in 1846 down toe 54 mm (2.12”) in the last study dated August 18 2007. The penis now resembles a Tootsie Roll that was left in someone’s pocket in the dryer.
Cranial size continues to grow in a malformed manner while the sub cortex and medulla oblongata have withered away baffling the worlds greatest minds to ask “how could such a beast procreate or even remember how to walk?
The Mississippi strain of the Howard is the most unremarkable and subhuman subspecies of the Howards and usually caught at night on trail cam performing beastiality on white tail deer.
Mississippi Howard’s can be identified easily by their slowed speech, irregular cranium shape and a under developed penis that resembles a small tootsie roll, amazingly this tiny appendage is black no matter skin color.
The first example studied by Harvard professors was in 1846 and was found at the Barnum and Bailey Circus as a side show for a 5 cent piece
Amazingly the Mississippi Howard has continued to regress in all aspects.
Take the tootsie roll shaped penis, as disgusting as this sounds it has regressed from 81 mm (3.18”) in 1846 down toe 54 mm (2.12”) in the last study dated August 18 2007. The penis now resembles a Tootsie Roll that was left in someone’s pocket in the dryer.
Cranial size continues to grow in a malformed manner while the sub cortex and medulla oblongata have withered away baffling the worlds greatest minds to ask “how could such a beast procreate or even remember how to walk?
by Lagniappe November 6, 2021
Get the Howardmug. probably one of the sexiest guys ever to be honest. sure you might think he’s a dick but you’ve gotta admit he has a huge penis and knows what he’s doing in bed.
by samisasexybeast October 27, 2021
Get the sam howardmug. When an athlete has fallen out of his prime 5 years ago but is paid more than most superstars, and is stuck with an unlucky team like a curse.
by Deez Nuts 2016 October 18, 2015
Get the Ryan Howardmug. The infamous super-successful mid-20th-century eccentric painter who really loved his colors. His father, Howard Hews, made his own fortune from designing heavy-duty truck-mudflaps.
Howard Hues maintained the family tradition of genius generating fabulous wealth from his awesomely-colored paintings; his father, Howard Hews, had made his own fortune from designing heavy-duty truck-mudflaps.
by QuacksO December 11, 2017
Get the Howard Huesmug. Da infamous Washington, D.C.-based sweets-shop that sold all the tasty-but-super-unhealthy ingredients of the Iran-Contra scandal --- orange mcfarlanade, oliver oil, poindextrose. etc. They also often had a sale on Tower cakes, and ran specials on chocolate-chip cookies by the Casey.
I've heard of confectionery-stores' selling all kinds of "sinful delights", but the Howard bakery really "took the cake" for the total rogue's gallery of appallingly-harmful culinary products on its shelves!
by QuacksO December 3, 2018
Get the Howard Bakerymug. Jade Howard is perfect even though jade Howard's can be a slut at times she makes up for it by being a beast in bed
by jadetheonisionlover February 14, 2017
Get the jade howardmug. by Panucci’s_Aaa May 23, 2023
Get the Jack Patterson-Howardmug.