Gettysburg Handjob

Violent masturbation. Usually to the point of bloodshed. Done unto oneself. (Get it? The bloodiest battle is the Civil War. Civil War is when a nation fights itself. lolz)

He was icing his junk this morning. Must have given himself a Gettysburg handjob last night.

by DWBB February 5, 2018

Platonic Handjob

A platonic friendship that goes dirty for a quick second of pleasure where a handjob is issued out to the lucky receiver.

Male equivalent of platonic fingering

Not to be confused with Atomic Handjob

So what happened last night?

Nothing much, just a platonic handjob.

by Whattareyoudoing May 12, 2018

Persian handjob

The act of when a old persian lady gets some tahdig and choresht and uses it as lube. After you cum she can have the hearted food cause the fun is so steamy.

My chaleh jUst gave me a persian handjob after we mofted food.

by Agha cos kesh August 28, 2018

Rotating Handjobs

A declaration of entering the final portion of a project.

At the production meeting the costume department reported being down to rotating handjobs, also noting the end was in sight.

by courier289 September 18, 2018

Kamikaze Handjob

It’s where you beat your meat and then all of a sudden, your girlfriend or boyfriend (if you swing that way) comes from out of nowhere and starts to jerk your meat and two seconds later, you bust a nut.

Greg: Yo what happened last night?
Chad: I don’t know, but last thing I remember is that Lucy did a Kamikaze Handjob on me.

Greg: Niiiice

by Yeet on them kids October 5, 2018

Bacon handjob

A handjob by an American landwhale.

Guy 1: "Hey bro, I heard you fucked with Becky, that fat cunt."
Guy 2: "I didn't spread those legs, I just got a bacon handjob."

by Gamerdactyl February 14, 2019

Feral Handjob

The use of mud , sand or dirt as lube as a woman jerks your off onto her stomach.

Natalie gave me a feral handjob and I blew my load all the way onto her face

Natalie gave me a feral handjob and I blew my load all the way onto her face.

by BellsBeach50 May 2, 2019