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Final Fantasy VII

For the average hardcore gamer who gamed in 1997, a flawless masterpiece.

For the intelligent and thoughtful gamer, game designer, or fiction writer/lover/TVTroper, a baffling combination of the extremely impressive and the mind-bogglingly pathetic. It had an incredible budget and yet they didn't seem to hire a quality assurance team, an experienced music arranger, an experienced 3D modeler, or especially an English proofreader.

The story would be genuinely touching if the translation weren't a garbled, largely incomprehensible mess, and if the 3D character designs and animations weren't among the hilariously worst ever made in a 3D game. Much of the art was breathtaking for the time, but the character models, which are the most emotive and arguably the most important visuals in the game, look horrendous. The music is fantastic in concept, but whoever converted it into MIDI doesn't know a fucking thing about how to use MIDI well-- although I will admit many of the songs did actually turn out well. There were a lot of complex ideas coded into the game, but there are far more hilarious and pathetic glitches in sheer number than even Sonic '06 has, even if the actual frequency of the glitches in VII compared to that of those in Sonic '06 is only 50% at worst.

Final Fantasy VII is not the *perfect* game, nor is it the most awful *joke*. More like, it is the *perfect joke*.
Bob: Hey man, Final Fantasy VII is the best game of all time!

Steve: If by "best" you mean it has "the largest gap of difference between the most amazing and the most awful points ever achieved within a single work", then yeah, it is.

Bob: Uhhhh... What?
by DenimMage September 8, 2013
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Final Fantasy

Overrated RPG series. Which of these "final" fantasies are actually going to be the last god damn Final Fantasy?
Final Fantasy fanboys get a major chubby any time you talk about the series.
by Lon September 5, 2005
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Fantasy Whore

Any player in the NFL that contributes nothing towards his team's win but puts up a great amount of fantasy points from scalping touchdowns at the goalline or running up the score when you're already up 50. Anyone in the top 10 fantasy points for running backs without 1000 rushing yards is a fantasy whore.
Tom Brady, Lendale White, Matt Forte and Marshawn Lynch; all can be defined as a fantasy whore.
by screwBrady January 21, 2011
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Final Fantasy 7

PS1 and PC rpg. Is slightly overrated. It was good, but not as good as 8.
Brainwashed FF7 junkie: "I dont care what you say, ff7 pwns all"

Me: "Keep telling yourself that..."
by Legendary Nick June 1, 2005
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Final Fantasy VIII

The winning contender for worst Final Fantasy game ever created. It was released after Final Fantasy VII and Squaresoft were hoping it would be just as successful as the last one. However, the changes they made to the system in the game were radical and only served to cripple the game, making it vastly unpopular and a flop.

The story focuses on a group of six characters, most of whom are mercenaries contracted out to help a struggling (read: worst I've ever seen) rebel group. From there, the characters fall victim to incredibly hackneyed, trite and implausible twists and turns in the story (such as the point where they all find out they knew each other as children but had their memories wiped).

The gameplay is quite bad and actively discourages the use of magic. The characters themselves have little to distinguish themselves from each other apart from their Limit Breaks. The Junctioning system (used to help improve your character, since evryone levels up at the same rate regardless of their level) is unnecessarily complex and fiddly, detracting from what little good gameplay there was.

Some elements of the game were good, but ultimately Final Fantasy VIII was a flop compared to may of the others.
At least you had a really hot schoolteacher with a whip on your team.
by Lofwyr September 3, 2005
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fantasy box

dude, i saw this bitch on the fantasy box, nobody can look that good...

-probably an android dude!
by michael foolsley November 20, 2009
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faptasize

FAPTASIZE/FAPTASIZING

The act of fapping and/or schlicking while fantasizing about something particularly sexy.
I faptasized on my bed this morning while I fingered my wet pussy with some makeup brushes. I came buckets! :)
by NeilPoonHandler November 3, 2012
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