A Mommy Pee Break is when a mother goes to the loo for a second and the kids decide to use that exact moment to raise all sorts of hell and run amok. Usually ends up in the house being trashed or burned down.
Candice: I just left them for a second and when I came back, all hell was loose! The ADSL cable is unplugged, the flatscreen TV has been demolished, my two year old is covered in cream, my perfume has been thrown down the sink and the dog has been painted green! All in the time it took for me to have a pee!
Jacques: Sounds like a standard Mommy Pee Break. If they are still alive and the house is still standing, we are doing good.
Candice: FML
Jacques: Sounds like a standard Mommy Pee Break. If they are still alive and the house is still standing, we are doing good.
Candice: FML
by laserswordofdeath +3 April 19, 2018
Get the Mommy Pee break mug.The time when kids get up to the craziest things, run amok and tear the house down. Usually happens when the mother has to relieve her bladder.
Can lead to rooms being destroyed and/or infanticide.
Can lead to rooms being destroyed and/or infanticide.
Candice: "Omfg! I was in the bathroom for ONE MINUTE! And when I came back, the plasma TV is broken on the floor, the ADSL cable had been chewed off, my two year old is covered in body cream, there is food on the ground and the dog is spraypainted green!"
Jacques: "Sounds like your standard Mommy Pee Break. Seriously, if the house was not set on fire and your kids are still in one piece, you count yourself lucky"
Candice: "What?! You think this is funny? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I DO ALL DAY?
Jacques: "Calm down, it's okay, I'm..."
Candice: "DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN YOU SON OF A BITCH! I KNOW WHAT YOU DID WITH ELAINE!"
Jacques: "Wait, what, who told you?!"
Candice: "I FUCKING SAW YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!"
Jacques: ...
Jacques: "Sounds like your standard Mommy Pee Break. Seriously, if the house was not set on fire and your kids are still in one piece, you count yourself lucky"
Candice: "What?! You think this is funny? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I DO ALL DAY?
Jacques: "Calm down, it's okay, I'm..."
Candice: "DON'T TELL ME TO CALM DOWN YOU SON OF A BITCH! I KNOW WHAT YOU DID WITH ELAINE!"
Jacques: "Wait, what, who told you?!"
Candice: "I FUCKING SAW YOU, YOU PIECE OF SHIT!"
Jacques: ...
by laserswordofdeath +3 April 19, 2018
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A meal at the beginning of the day consisting mainly of unwanted oral sex, boiled beans, and rummaging.
**Some cultures follow up with a half bottle of mouthwash or a few cap fulls of isopropyl alcohol.
**Some cultures follow up with a half bottle of mouthwash or a few cap fulls of isopropyl alcohol.
Old Junkyard Bob was surprised when he awoke to Slippery Sam serving him a hobo's breakfast on Christmas morning.
by do0tz December 1, 2017
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Get the Flipping a breaker mug.a best friend heart break is when who you thought was ur bestfriend plays with ur mind over and over again until one day your heart just shatters
bestfriend: “i love you and your my bestfriend “. and I’ll just say that to hurt cause I’m lying.
Chloe: thank you for taking my heart and then breaking it. my bestfriend heart break
Chloe: thank you for taking my heart and then breaking it. my bestfriend heart break
by ccn553 December 16, 2017
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Get the The post-breakfast club mug.“No Bathroom Breaks” is a word only used by someone who is in their late 40s and is probably going to go no where in their life.
Student 1: Sir, May I please go the bathroom... I got to shit.
Teacher 1: No Bathroom Breaks.
Student 1: *shits bricks on teachers keyboard while singing “Rockstar” by Postmalone*
Teacher 1: No Bathroom Breaks.
Student 1: *shits bricks on teachers keyboard while singing “Rockstar” by Postmalone*
by FatPat_P March 6, 2018
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