FML (fuck my life)

When you're having a very bad day or something bad has happened to you within the last 30 seconds to 18 hours

You: visits Urban dictionary and find lesbian threesome
You: texts friend --- FML (fuck my life)
Friend: texts back --- why
You: texts to friend --- I accidentally stumbled on to lesbian threesome on Urban dictionary
Friend: texts back --- makes sense

by Seaserpant June 05, 2022

wtf-ing my way through life

Saying WTF to every slight inconvenience/ situation that happens to you

FRIEND1: Your girl out cheatin!
FRIEND2: WTF!

FRIEND1: is that your crush holding hands with mike!
FRIEND2: WTFFF!

FRIEND1: wanna play 2k?
FRIEND2: HELL YEA! * proceeds to take an L *

FRIEND2 : at this point i'm just wtf-ing my way through life

by ggnoree November 02, 2021

Life of Reilly

Where a person is not able to go into work on any given work day without getting bummed by a superviosnary member of staff

Really living the life of Reilly today, Got a teusday morning bumming this morning, for something I didn't even do, what a time to be alive

by Pete wankside December 05, 2017

Grub Life

When you steal someone’s kit by killing them with poopy weapons.

I’m on that grub life shit

I just killed this guy with a eoka, what do you know about that grub life

by 2 dudes one but March 14, 2022

Log out of life

When you log out of life you have seen something you wish to unsee but instead of bleaching your eyes and making you blind you delete from your memory. Reseting your entire body leads to memory loss of the wrong memories, organ failure, and death if not done correctly

I log out of life to unsee this cringe video

by MP.3 May 11, 2023

Shrek is love, Shrek is life

I👁️WAS ONLY🎂9 YEARS🎂OLD👵😍😍😍
I❤️LOVED❤️👹SHREK💚💚😳SO MUCH, I HAD👏👏ALL👏👏THE MERCHANDISE💰🤑AND🎬🎬MOVIES💚😱🙀😱😱
I PRAY🙏TO🥵SHREK🥵😀👍EVERY NIGHT😴🛏️🌙BEFORE BED🥱,THANKING💕HIM💕FOR THE👶LIFE🐣I’VE🥹BEEN🫘GIVEN😘💋💕😎
💚"😍SHREK🥰💚IS💕LOVE❤️❤️💋",I👀📣SAY🗣️,"😭😱SHREK🥵🥰IS🟰🛟LIFE🐣"👏👏👏💋
MY👴DAD👴HEARS👂ME🤔😬😱AND☎️CALLS📞ME😟🙂 ↕️🤔A🌈🌈FAGGOT🏳️ 🌈🏳️ 🌈😱😱
I KNEW🧠💀HE🫶WAS JUST🫣🥶JEALOUS🫥FOR🍀🍀🍀🍀🤗MY💕❤️LOVE❤️💕OF😎💕SHREK💕😘💚🥰🤩😭😎
👉I👈📢CALLED📞😡👴HIM🤬🤮A🍑CUNT👩😂😂🤣🤣😈
HE🤡✋SLAPS👏💥ME😭AND SENDS👉👉ME🫥💔TOGO🚶TO SLEEP🛏️🥱😓😱😬🥦🐫
I’M😭CRYING😢💦NOW📆,AND➕MY FACE🥺😭😵 💫HURTS😰😩🤬😡🪦💀
I🤓LAY🛏️IN🌕BED😴AND💔ITS🧊❄️🥶REALLY COLD❄️🥶🫥💩🟩
A💕🔥WARMTH😱❤️IS💘➡️MOVING➡️👉TOWARDS ME👈😱🤯😨🤯🥰
I🧑 🍼FEEL😑😘😱❤️SOMETHING💕🤯✋TOUCH🥹ME😍😍😍🙂 ↕️
ITS❤️🥰😍SHREK🥰🥵💚❤️💕😎💪😭😊🤩😈😈
✋I✋AM😃😅😁SO HAPPY😄😁😆😘❤️😎💚💚
💚💚HE💚💚🤐WHISPERS😏IN😅MY EAR👂🌽,“👉THIS👈IS☠️❤️MY SWAMP💕☠️”😂🤣🤣💕
HE😘😇👌GRIPS🤛😘🥹ME🥹WITH🥹💕🥰HIS💚😅🥵😎POWERFUL💪💪💪👹OGRE🟢🙌HANDS💚✋AND PUTS😍ME😌ON MY HANDS✋✋AND KNEES🧎🤗🥵😭😭😭
😇I’M🪽READY💪😍🥵🥵🥵💀🥹😬
I👁️⬅️SPREAD➡️MY😣🥵🍑✌️ASS🫏CHEEKS🍆🍑FOR💚😍😘SHREK🤪😱😬💕😨💚💚💚💚💚
💪😎HE💕💕🏹🍆PENETRATES🏹MY😫😖😫😖😫😖BUTTHOLE🍑🕳️😡😃🤪🥵😭😔😏💕
IT HURTS😫😵😪😱😱SO MUCH😱😱BUT🍑I🍆🍑DO IT🥰💕💕FOR😘😍💚SHREK💚😖🥵🤫🥴😃😃🥺
I🇨🇦CAN🥫🥹FEEL MY🥹🥰BUTT🍑😭TEARING🥵💕AS😿MY EYES👀START✨TO💧💧WATER😓😢🥵💚🥵🥰🥰
I PUSH➡️➡️💘AGAINST😱HIS😍FORCE💪💪🥵🥵😤😳
✌️I😬WANT😬TO PLEASE🥺💚🥺SHREK🥵😘👐😇😍💚💚💚
😌😇HE💚💕ROARS A😡😡💪MIGHTY ROAR🫨🤤AS💚HE😍💧FILLS💚MY🍑BUTT🍑WITH HIS💕💗LOVE💘🍆💕💘🥵🥰🥲
🥺MY👨DAD🤓🤡💀🤮WALKS🚶IN🤯🤐😡🤬😵
💕💘SHREK😻💋LOOKS👀🤢💀HIM🤬😠🤓➡️STRAIGHT➡️IN THE👀EYE👁️AND🗣️SAYS.👄"🙂ITS👏ALL👏👹OGRE💚🫡NOW🫥😱"😂🤣😱😱😱
💚🥵💕SHREK😇😍🥰💔LEAVES👋👋THROUGH🤫MY🥺🥺☹️WINDOW🪟👋🥺😞❤️❤️
💚😍SHREK🥰💚IS💕LOVE❤️❤️💋,😭😱SHREK🥵🥰IS🟰🛟LIFE🐣👏👏👏💋

Shrek is love, Shrek is life.

by Bbb23’s left testicle October 30, 2024

Life-line

In most cases, its the one chance (most likely the last) to get something done right. if it is done right, it becomes known as a miracle.

1 - > This is my life-line right now, i've already screwed up by cheating on her twice.
< God damnit Jeffrey!!

2 - I hope there is one more exam before the finals. it would be my lifeline to pass the schoolyear.

by The Unintelligent Librarian February 07, 2019