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The Growing Pains Paradox

This is when you find yourself staying up late to do something that seems like a good idea at the time, but you regret it in the morning. Most commonly this occurs during television watching.

Commedian Jim Gaffigan has brought this issue to light during his stand up routines. In particular, Gaffigan goes into detail about staying up late to watch a Growing Pains marathon. This seems like a great idea at the time, but upon waking up...Growing Pains wasn't such a good idea afterall.

So essentially The Growing Pains Paradox is staying up late for anything that seems like a good idea in the evening. However, due to the lack of sleep you regret the decision in the morning.
"Uggh, why did I stay up last night watching a marathon of Ninja Warrior? I hate The Growing Pains Paradox!"
by Danger33 May 9, 2009
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Paramore

The best band out there. Fuck everyone else who says they suck. Go eat your mom.
Ex. 1:

Did you see Paramore live on MTV?!
Yeah, they fuckin rocked!
by Sydney Curroso February 14, 2009
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Related Words

paragon

German Power Metal outfit fronted by Andreas Babuschkin while sporting the fine guitar work of Martin Christian.
Paragon have released another cracking dose of German Power Metal
by AlecJames October 16, 2007
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Paragon Point

In RL you can give out paragon points as recognition for
A.) Acting like a bitch
B.) Caking
C.) Deciding to dip out on fun for responsibilities
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In the xbox 360 game mass effect, paragon points are given to the player after they:
A.) Act like a pussy
B.) Skip badass cinematic because they don't want to kill anyone
C.) Release a deadly acid spitting alien into the galaxy because they're fucking retarded
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Scott: "Hey Seb, you gonna party with us tonight?"

Seb: "Sorry guys I think I'm going to study for that chem exam tomorrow instead of drinking until i black out naked in the lawn"

Scott: "What a bitch"

Eric: "Two paragon points you pussy piece of shit!" (yelling at Seb)

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Jason: "Dude! MSI is playing in the city you should totally dip out on work and come with us!"

Fletcher: "Ah shit! I would, but I got work and the manager might be upset with me if I called in on such short of notice."

Jason: "...way to be a tool, paragon points lame ass"
by Eric Holocaust February 11, 2008
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Paracorn

noun; a somewhat mythical creature believed to originate from southern Singapore.

The Paracorn is described as a paraplegic unicorn usually colored white and most commonly have their front legs replaced by wheels.

The Paracorn is closely related to the Paracornagus.
Devon: Is that a paraplegic unicorn?

Richard: Ahh, yes. A Paracorn
by Braiden Donaven May 18, 2010
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Blanchard's Paradox

The dilemma that all autogynephilic men must confront: stay a man and remain sexually unfulfilled on account of not being a woman; or become a woman and remain sexually unfulfilled on account of all the hormone therapy nuking your sex drive.
I honestly don't know whether to troon out or not: how will I fap to not having a dick any more if I don't have a dick? It's Blanchard's Paradox all over.
by muggsymoon May 8, 2022
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Zeno's Paradox

A paradox in applied philosophy analogous to Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principle.

Tenet 1 - Advice or information taken from Zeno at face value will always be wrong.

Tenet 2- Investigation or contestation of any information taken from Zeno will always show it to be correct.

Corollary to Tenet 2- When such a contest is resolved in Zeno's favor (as it always will be) the contesting party will be severely mocked.

Therefore, interaction with Zeno will always result in the interacting party coming away wronged or mocked.
A bargain leather jacket was purchased on the basis of Zeno's insistence that it was real leather. As it turned out, it was not real leather. Forty dollars was lost when a hot fork punctured a whole in it.

But mocking ensued when, despite everyone's doubts and harangues, Zeno's method for estimating hourly television power costs turned out to be completely correct.

According to Tenet 1 of the paradox, if the leather jacket had not been purchased, it would in fact have been real leather.

According to Tenet 2 of the paradox, if Zeno's method for power estimation had not been knocked, the estimates it provided would have been grossly erroneous.
by Piggus McKenzie November 18, 2004
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