ass wipe

an insult for a fucking idiot who’s stupid as hell

erica is a fucking ass wipe

by Yungsavagealex October 17, 2019

Shweat Wipe

The act of wiping ones inexplicably shitty arse without having actually passed a stool.

"Man, you would not have believed that was just a shweat wipe, I saw sweetcorn!"

by The Last Lizard King July 5, 2016

tactical wipe

Something that is absolutely necessary in a heatwave, for the old gooch.

Simon: oh my gooch is absolutely sodding in this heat.
Paul: oh you just need a tactical wipe simon, that’ll sort you out sir.

by Relatablegirth June 9, 2023

Military wipe

When a person of service goes #2 and only uses one sheet of paper to wipe by wrapping the single piece of paper around their index finger and inserts the finger into their anus and wiping with a circular movement.

I only had one piece of TP left So i had to " military wipe"!

by NoGameOBMC October 19, 2016

Bar Wipe

The classic spaghetti western-style saloon fight move when one wipes the bar down with another person (preferably face first), effectively cleaning the bar top of all inanimate objects.

Guy #1: "So did you knock that drunk dude out?"
Guy #2: "Nah, he was way too drunk so I just gave him the ol' Bar Wipe."

by Martyr0ne June 8, 2018

Juul wipe

When the person wipes the mouthpiece of your vape before giving it back to you.

Daniel is a lit dude! He always does a juul wipe after he hits my vape!

by Kittykibble January 25, 2019

dick wipe

A brand of dispossible towels designed to be used to wipe your penis after a messy ejaculation when your lover is not allowing to suck excess semen from your face, and no blinds/bedclothes/curtians are at hand to fill this roll. Constructed from 100% cotton for that nice soft delicate penis wiping experience, and comes in a large range of aromatic and pleasing-to-the-nose smells...

''Aww shit, It's everywhere, Man I wish id bought a DICK WIPE

by James Foxhall May 13, 2005