A wild penis is a crazyass penis that has contracted so many lethal venereal diseases from such frequent, intense, puke-evoking wanking and/or intercourse that it has miraculously grown its own functioning DNA and come to life. One can find wild penes almost anywhere they can find any animal, but they are often identified by the kind of environment they live in (ex. common house penes, saltwater penes, woodland penes, prairie penes, etc.). When a penis goes wild, each component of it resembles a vital physical function on/in a large-scale mammal. For instance, its testicles become its feet, its foreskin becomes its head, its urethral opening becomes its mouth, parts of its epididymis become its arms and paws, and maybe its pearly penile papules become its eyes-I honestly know very little to nothing about biology and everything else. Defenses: They piss on anything/anyone they dislike and threatening houses. They cumblast their natural predators, vulvae, to poison them and/or drive them away. This definition is rational as fuck! As proof, among many other places, wild penes abound in Chimi Lhakhang, Bhutan.
Idiot 1: It's just a penis. It doesn't have stingers, teeth or claws. It's completely harmless! So why the fuck are you panicking so much?!?!
Idiot 2: This was no ordinary penis, man. It could walk and breath, even though it was disembodied!
Idiot 1: No, it can't be. They went extinct more than ten millennia ago!
Idiot 2: I don't know what the motherfuck you're saying!!!
Idiot 1: I'm saying you'd better kill yourself, Idiot 2! It's the only way to avoid the misery that will befall civilization with the invasion of the wild penis.
Idiot 2: This was no ordinary penis, man. It could walk and breath, even though it was disembodied!
Idiot 1: No, it can't be. They went extinct more than ten millennia ago!
Idiot 2: I don't know what the motherfuck you're saying!!!
Idiot 1: I'm saying you'd better kill yourself, Idiot 2! It's the only way to avoid the misery that will befall civilization with the invasion of the wild penis.
by E idiots dei March 22, 2020
Get the wild penismug. by masterofdaworldnumba2 November 29, 2009
Get the bush-wildmug. Wilding out for no reason and looking dumb while you're doing it. This word is usually for women that are either crazy, dumb, dumb as hell or loud as hell.
by Fake Wilding May 25, 2018
Get the Fake Wildingmug. The act of taking a stinging sloppy shit the morning or afternoon after a night out on the guiness or a very spicy meal/pizza. Worst case scenario involves breathlessness and possible vomiting during shitting.
by Yosser Hughes July 31, 2017
Get the Wild Shitesmug. When your hitten' it doggy style and unexpectedly drop it in their ass, grab the pigtails and hold on for the ride.
The wild bull... can best be described as riding a bull in the bedroom (or wherever you do so choose to get your jollies).
by Huung January 9, 2008
Get the The wild bull.mug. by Wild tamie September 24, 2019
Get the wild tamiemug. You: Sorry buddy, I’ve got to go. I’ve got the call of the wild.
Buddy: Which call?
You: A shit.
Buddy: I thought you meant to masturbate.
You: Piss off I need a shit. Goodbye.
Buddy: Which call?
You: A shit.
Buddy: I thought you meant to masturbate.
You: Piss off I need a shit. Goodbye.
by FlatCapWolf October 26, 2022
Get the call of the wildmug.