drapes match the carpet

If a person wants to know if someone's pubic hair is the same color (or in some cases, same style) as the hair on their head, they might ask "Do the drapes match the carpet?" The drapes are hair; carpet is pubic hair. This is akin to asking "Is she a true blond?" Someone's obviously dyed hair might prompt this speculation: "I'll bet the drapes don't match the carpet."

Lisa has a shaved head. I wonder if the drapes match the carpet?

Didn't she used to be a brunette and now she's a blond? I'll bet the drapes don't match the carpet.

by Glenwood October 1, 2006

The Carpenter's Plunger

The Carpenter's Plunger is the ultimate rough sex toy.
Basically its a lightweight Balsa wood dildo wrapped in Commercial grade 60 sandpaper. The idea being to get rid of bumps and existing cum residue making insertion cleaner and easier.

Susie's cunt was cum clogged , but after a few applications with The Carpenter's Plunger, insertion was made easy.

by Bowds October 9, 2006

vacuuming the carpet

Woman giving her man a blowjob.
Giving getting head
Knob job

I can't believe she would vacuum your carpet.
..

So Shelly did you vacuum his carpet yet?
...
No one vacuumed my carpet that deep before Teresa.
...
Don't interrupt me she is vacuuming the carpet.

by FatherTimeWarp November 27, 2011

Does the carpet match the drapes?

An annoying, rather bothersome question. It is suggested to return as described:

"Does the carpet match the drapes?"
"There's no carpet, it's just hardwood."

by ahelpfulstranger May 15, 2016

CLEANING THE CARPET

PERFORMING CUNNILINGUS

My boyfriend really likes cleaning the carpet!

by JenPaulII October 23, 2009

combing the carpet

1. The act of crawling around on the floor looking for small pieces of crack cocain that may have fallen in the carpet. This is a very common occurrence after crack heads and crack whores run out of drugs and money.
2. The act of searching for LSD after you have spilled it into the carpet.

vachil was combing the carpet for 3 hours after running out of crack.
Ford spent the night combing the carpet after spilling a vile of microdot acid on the rug.

by Ford Lawnmower November 6, 2007

Under The Carpet Homie

The closest of friends. Someone who would sleep under the carpet with you when you had no blanket.

Yo, thats my under the carpet homie. He’s a real one.

by Nut guy June 3, 2020