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Ghost Pooping

1. The act of hiding in the bathroom, pretending to take a poop, while engaged in some non-poop related activity such as playing a game on your smartphone or surfing the internet.

2. Spending way more time than needed in the bathroom, playing games or some other waste of time on your phone.

3. Hiding in the bathroom pretending to take a poop in an attempt to avoid some other responsibility.
Hey team, I'm at work but I'm Ghost Pooping so I can get my clan rumble in before time is up.

What's taking Bob so long in the Bathroom? I bet he's ghost pooping and playing Fortnite.

My wife wants me to change the baby's diaper, so I'm ghost pooping instead.
by Brendon K February 5, 2019
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Dog pooping on a baby

A legen...wait for it...dary video of a dog pooping on a baby found by the great Barney Stinson.
Barney: Hey Marshall, check out this sick vido I found of a dog pooping on a baby.

Marshall: Shut up Barney, I need to found out how i did on the BAR exam.

Barney: But its a dog pooping on a baby!!
by MY_PRO_GAMERTAG January 9, 2012
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Poking the Purple Plum

To finger massage the male Prostate through the anus. Also referred to as Prostate Milking. Performed as a stand alone act or may be accompanied by the performance of fellatio.
While performing oral sex and slobbing on Carl's knob, his girl friend decided to enhance the experience and starting Poking the Purple Plum. Carl squirmed up until the second knuckle passed through his pucker knot thereafter, he enjoyed a good old fashioned milking of his prostate.
by Eaton Holgoode April 7, 2015
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Poongus

An insult that can replace almost any swear word but still remain clean enough to not be considered one.
Mike: You're a fucking poongus
Dave: What the fuck is poongus?
Mike: Suck my poongus you poongus.
by QuikMaffs October 30, 2020
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Pooping

A sacred time for a man. A time where a man can contemplate his day while excreting his waste. A man does all his critical thinking whilst pooping. A man often goes to the bathroom and poops when something needs deep thought. It is believed that if a man could poop for long enough, he could solve world hunger, poverty, and possibly discover the cure for AIDS. This magic time is referred to by many names such as, Taking the Browns to the Super Bowl, dropping a log, dropping a stink pickle, and releasing the brown hostage.
Friend One: Bill is still pooping, what's going on?
Friend Two: He's trying to solve Da Vinci's Code, give him a break.
by Big Eve January 12, 2016
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POKING JUNIOR IN THE EYE

Simply said, having sex with a pregnant woman.
Billy Bob and Brad took turns with Angelina poking junior in the eye.
by mj_oblio September 12, 2005
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posing for animal crackers

It means you are sitting/standing around being fucking useless while everyone around you is doing something.
Hey, (insert coworker name here). Are you posing for animal crackers or do you think you might pick up the phone when it rings?
by Lady NY February 4, 2017
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