Farts and Prayers

Giving a non-denominational fart and prayer in tribute to a fallen subjects memory. A far more tangible take on the often and overall useless but nevertheless used 'thoughts and prayers.'

Goofus: Dawwwg! Remember that bitch Bernice from high school who's dog died in 9-11? I ran into the bitch at my daughters school bake sale and I was all of a sudden so overcome with muthafuckin' emotion from her struggle to overcome that loss that my bowels overtook my heart and I farted in front of her and then dropped to one knee and said a hail mary in remembrance to fido. Just one because dogs are not equal to people but enough to not let his loss not be in vain. I think its from all that Amy Grant i've been listening to lately B. Anyways, Farts and Prayers.

Gallant: You are such an insensitive and insufferable prick!

by Queef_Quackenbush_Jr October 17, 2020

The farts

A rapid onset of multiple and uncontrollable farts after eating an offending meal. Typically acute but can be chronic based on the frequency of consumption of the offending item(s).

I ate Taco Hell and now I have a serious case of the farts.

by Aquemini June 2, 2015

gummy farts

Slang for what is often booming and extended flatulence precipitated by consuming fiber gummies.

It’s an obvious gummy farts production, an undeniable symphony composed by my nightly healthy habit of supplementing my fiber intake with enough fiber gummies to create all of this classical gas.

by Dr Bunnygirl September 17, 2019

Sir Fartsalot

A nickname for the 45th POTUS because he is passing gas every time he speaks.

Look at Sir Fartsalot as he flails with his panicky little hands!

by Dr Bunnygirl May 20, 2020

farts-in-a-box

Kind of like a child’s jack-in-the-box but with a noxious fart-cloud released instead.

The festive looking farts-in-a-box musical device was cranked with glee until the boy realized what the “Pop Goes the Weasel” tune would finally mean.

by Dr Bunnygirl January 12, 2019

Heinekin farts

The horrific bodily emissions which are a by product of the consumption of Heinekin beer. This phenomenon can occur with just about any beer, however, Heinekin is especially effective in producing this occurrence.

Oh my god Mike, that smells like Heinekin farts! You sick human being.

by pterodactyl55 October 19, 2010

cartoon farts

A description of flatulence so shocking and extreme that it winds up being entertaining.

Startling percussive booms and deafening trumpet tones defined his uniquely humorous signature cartoon farts.

by Dr Bunnygirl June 16, 2019