Crysterbation

1.Verb- crying whilst in the process of masturbation.

2.Noun- see above

Portrayed accurately in Little Ashes by Robert Pattinson when his gay lover hooks up with the girl he loves while he is in the room (confused yet? Don't be, basically Robert Pattinson is incapable of playing a character that questions his sexuality) (oh by the way, Little Ashes is an accurate portrayl of Salvador Dali's life, soooo as far as I know, Salvador Dali is the only case of crysterbation in mass media. More win for surrealists) "I thought he was simply crying in his room until he ran out of breath and I heard something else; he was clearly crysterbating."

by Salvador Dali win December 23, 2010

Crysterbate

Verb: To Crysterbate

Cry-sterbating is when a guy stands in a corner, crying using his own tears as lube while he jerks off sobbing, nuts into a teaspoon, drinks the nut because he's low on zinc, and then sits in the fetal position rocking back and forth wondering "When the hell did my life get so depressing?" Then he remembers and does it all again. Just like shampoo directions, rinse, wash, and repeat.

Billy: Wheres Dillon?

Josh: He's probably at home cry-sterbating again

Dillon tends to crysterbate instead of masturbating because his life is so fucked up. Plus he's low on zinc.

by Trip Wilson May 30, 2017

Cristofer

Cris is the biggest dumbfuck of all time he is annoying sometimes but he is cool.

Wow that kid is such a cristofer sometimes

by Eat that pussy445 March 13, 2017

cristofer drew

1. singer of NEVERshoutNEVER 2. the cutest guy in the whole world 3. guy with an absolute amazing voice and awesome hair 4. kristina's future husband !

girl: Did you see that fine boy walking down the street?

kristina: yea. that's my man Cristofer Drew.

by hi_kristina March 19, 2009

crysterbation

when you cry whilst masterbating

your on the north pole your tears are frozen....crysterbation

by jarnzy November 29, 2010

Crystopher

Crystopher is a caring and straightforward human. Crystopher is generous and Business minded individual.

If you have a Crystopher in your life; Consider yourself blessed.

by Lick_it September 9, 2020

crysterbate

crysterbating is when girls get really upset about getting broken up with and masturbate while tears are streaming down their face into their cunts and moistening their clitoris.

you're welcome.

Jenny was devastated after Joe dumped her. As she sat on her bed, sobbing uncontrollably, she realized her tears had soaked through her panties, moistening her clitoris into a swollen, tender state. She could no longer control her urges, and began to crysterbate furiously while tears poured down her face.

by Blacc Hole January 25, 2010