coffeces

The shit you have to take soon after drinking a cup of coffee

"Sheri is suffering from a case of coffeces courtesy of Starbucks"

by ILuvBlumpkinPie January 22, 2014

asshole coffee

The act of buying a coffee for an individual/group to make up for being an asshole

The man cut in line so he bought everyone an asshole coffee

by Skippyzu July 21, 2019

coffee

A legal, addictive stimulant.

Coffee is cheaper than meth.

by MamaBurd March 27, 2012

Commoners Coffee

From the anime, Ouran Highschool Host Club. It means instant coffee, as 'poor people don't have enough time to grind their own coffee beans'

"I'm going out to get some commoners coffee, want to come?"

by Princess Bubblegum Alicorn August 14, 2015

Coffee Condom

A cardboard sleeve made to insulate to-go coffee cups.

I did not use a coffee condom and my espresso got cold. I should learn to practice safe drinking.

by Dr Piggapuss October 1, 2018

who pissed in your coffee

When someone is in a particularly foul mood first thing in the morning. Many people will have a cup of coffee before anything else is taken care of. Therefore their coffee must have been pissed in to start their day off so badly.

Joe: "Hi Jack! Wonderful day isn't it?"
Jack: "Ah fuck yourself you fucking fuck!"
Joe: "Well who pissed in your coffee this morning asshole!"

by Jumpingrat March 29, 2007

Pouring Coffee

To pour coffee is to plug a drain with feces. Most often said in reference places such as public restrooms and water fountains. The term originated from how the water turns brown with shit. Waffle stomping is a similar activity, but more associated with a private setting.

Person 1: Dude, I saw someone pouring coffee in the water fountain.
Person 2: Shit, now I can't hydrate.

by Dyspros April 19, 2022