Bible

A collection of scriptures written by men such as, but not limited to, Moses, David, Solomon, Daniel, Matthew, Mark, Luke, Peter, James, John, and Paul (formerly Saul). All were inspired by God and are considered holy and good for teaching, reproof, correction, & for training in righteousness. While faith is required, archeology has proven many aspects of Biblical accounts of history to be true, even by secularists who deny any supernatural elements. The Bible teaches that a virgin gave birth to the Son of God, (virgin birth sounds silly but God can do whatever he wants, because he literally controls the universe, so the point is moot). This Person, Jesus, lived sinlessly and was killed for telling the truth about his Godly nature and the hypocrisy of religious leaders of the time. He rose again three days later and his followers spread this message, with some receiving devine inspiration for their writings.
I love reading the Bible, it is so encouraging in these dark times
by Charlie 27 December 25, 2020
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The Bible

A book written by a bunch of hippies, about 2000 years ago, who were smoking some serious hash at the time. Never actually figured for their text to be taken seriously.
"Hey, Josh, dude, let's put some shit in their about a guy, right?"

"Yeah, rad man, and he can be like... uh, tossed overboard into the, uh, like ocean, right?"

"Cool, and then, like... a giant fish, just like, comes up and swallows him, man."

"AWWWWH, far out man!"

"And he could then, like, chill in the fish for a few days, before it like... spits him back out, you know?"

"Chilled man."

"What should we call this book, yo?"

"How about, like, someting that sounds like Babel."

"Yeah, like the town."

"Only, bib... Bibe.... oh, The Bible!"

"Holy shit man!"
by Degree7 July 09, 2009
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Bible

A large book well over 1,000 pages written about a single subject (i.e. Christianity, chicken, heck, even a dictionary could be the bible of words.).
Jake: "Hey guys! Wanna read my Gun Bible?"
Nick: "No! The Holy Christian Bible is where it's at."
Kyle: "But my Chicken Cooking Bible is the only way to go!"
by crisisT47 July 15, 2016
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Bible

If the bible says it, its gotta be true
by Mr. Seuss, PhD June 05, 2011
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Bible

The best sci-fi fantasy book ever
Dave: i really do think star wars might be the best sci-fi fantasy ever
Bob:well...have you read the bible
by Fukbois r ded May 06, 2018
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The Bible

The most famous fantasy novel in human history.
The Bible isn't even that good, LOTR is a much better fantasy novel. The Bible is quite stupid and contradicts itself a lot. I think a retard wrote it.
by Bloodbath 87 March 06, 2009
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Bible

Oh, a bible... well it's getting cold so why the hell not
by Whothefckreadsdis November 23, 2019
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