wood trolling 

Conservative rednecks roaming through the neighborhood looking for wood (cut down tree, curb side wood) for wood stove. They do this not to save the environment but to avoid paying fuel taxes and to obtain a nearly free way to heat home for winter. They can be recognized by large pick’m up truck going up and down the street with gadsden bumper sticker or flag, usually a chain saw in bed or towing a wood splitter, do not engage as they are heavily armed.

Hey boy, get the shot gun and hook up the splitter, we a-going wood trolling!

wood trolling by MrPlankton May 4, 2009

wooden table 

your penis

Can I see your "wooden table"?

wooden table by rawrxdxdxdxdxdxd October 14, 2017

wood table

An ingrian or simple person, normally very pissy.

Kate Weaver and Michael Iovenko are wood tables after they tried to sell dope to the cops.

wood table by ingrain99 May 15, 2016

Wooden toenails

An insult referring to someone’s body, or someone who actually has wooden toenail... if you know those kind of people.

Look at you you wooden toenails

Wooden toenails by Suicidal doorknob April 3, 2019

The Chiseled Wood Theory 

The Chiseled Wood theory claims that any object (under the right circumstances and or preferences) can become so valuable to the point that someone would kill another just to obtain it. In this case a singular wood chip. Lets give you an example, lets say that water dissolves from the planet, except for water found in wood. Thus people begin chopping down trees to acquire water from the inside of trunks. Or in a condensed form or shard. Thus a wood chip. This theory can apply to 100 percent of all objects. Even including animal and human feces and piss. Because it still stands as a source of nutrients and water. Even in small quantities. The question goes deeper into identity what is incapable of become worth a persons while. Can a pocket of nothing become worth something? In the saying " Another mans junk is another mans treasure" we can assume that everything (Including literally nothing) can become extremely valuable. We already see this theory in place all around us, air and livestock would be in high demand in space. Thus one thing that is in high abundance (for now) is air on earth. If you were in a life and death situation you would kill the person with the highest air supply. Things change value over time and over sociological preferences and needs.

The Chiseled Wood Theory: everything can have extreme value.

The Chiseled Wood Theory by The Crab people January 19, 2021

Jack woods the smart man 

A big brainerd who is smart as fuck and needs to get a real life

Jack woods the smart man needs a life

Jack woods the smart man by Icejjfishy October 22, 2020

Put the wood to

spanked, beat, whipped with a switch, clobbered with a bat or board, punished severely.

They not only fined him, they fired him and put him in jail. Yeah, they really put the wood to him .

Put the wood to by LadyEngineer January 1, 2021