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praying mantis

When you are having sex with a woman from behind and after she orgasms she reaches back and rips your head off.
Oh man, maria totally praying mantis'd alex last night.
by MantisMan December 12, 2010
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preading

The act of pre-reading.
"I spent my afternoon preading for the Economics lecture."
by BioSta July 27, 2016
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Praying to the Porcelain Goddess

Function: verb
Etymology: Orgin Unknown although believed to have come from religous customers of fast food restaurants.

1. To vomit into a lavatory bowl while on your hands and knees as if one is in a position of prayer.
2. To defecate diarrheal contents tensely into a toilet bowl with hands held together and in the air as if one is praying.
MAN! I once ate at Taco Bell and because of that I was praying to the Porcelain Goddess all night!
by The Amazing Anonymous One July 10, 2004
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Guatemalan Praying Mantis

Identification: Guatemalan Mantises (guat mantids) are among the nastiest hood rats found in the general population. Adults range from 5 to 6 ft long, are dark, & usually brown, or yellowish (jaundice-drug or alcohol use). The females have big boobs & big front arms consisting of long jagged nails to attack sexual competition & random hoes. The male tends to be tatted, drunk & high on drugs. The vernacular/tone of this mantis consists of yelling & belligerence. Their large heads can rotate about 180 degrees & have large, bulging eyes. The term “Praying” comes from a common occurrence of vomiting on the weekends.

Lookalikes: Guat Mantids are not distinctive & can be confused with other mantids such as the Mexican & Puerto Rican variety. But the Guat genus is far more lazy, violent & volatile than it’s Mexican cousin, relating closer to its Puerto Rican relative.

Life Cycle: The Guat genus does not typically live a long life. The males succumb to gang violence, drug overdoses, & domestic abuse. The female tends to live longer than the male. It drains the lifeblood, bank accounts & credit cards of its mate slowly, & instead of decapitating it’s mate like other mantises, it’s aggressive & confrontational to the rest of the mantis population, further alienating its mate.

Habitat: Unfortunately, infestations of Guat Mantids are found throughout N. America, but you can primarily find them at terrible bars, clubs, & the streets. They lurk in the shadows waiting for prey to arrive.
Heard your friend George married a Guatemalan Praying Mantis. I hope he’s ready for a life of misery, craziness and isolation.
by bertrando1 May 23, 2023
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Praying Mantis

Used to describe one's physical position when seated next to a seat bitch on an airplane or bus. In the seated position -- Both elbows are centered in above the stomach and the hands remain above the elbows. This ensures that no part of the body is allowed, remains, or otherwise intrudes upon another's seating or personal space.
I sat next to this seat bitch on my plane. My ass was doing the Praying Mantis the whole way!
by Biatch551 September 18, 2005
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Preying on the prophet

'Real Housewives' slang for gettin' some of dat holy penis
Real Housewives of Atlanta's Drew Sidora pulled out receipts on LaToya Ali, who apparently got quite close to Prophet Lott... in the Biblical sense. Drew accused her of "Preying on the prophet" and ruining the christening of her young daughter.
by Uncle Joosie April 13, 2021
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praying mantits

When a man has such flabby tits that he is able to press them together so they touch, much like a set of praying titties.
Man, take a look at that guy. That's a real nice set of praying mantits. I'm jealous!
by Mr. Balloonhands November 17, 2013
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