hallmark porn

Noun. A film that starts at 8 o’clock and will reply three times in the next 24 hours that features Christmas lights and soft core women’s porn with no penetration.

I was wearing my crocs and fishnets while Diana and I enjoyed a Pino Grigio and Hallmark Porn.

by EZlikesundaymorning May 28, 2021

Hallmark holiday

Unlike the sanctity of the traditional high holidays, the Hallmark Holiday was invented by the executives of the Hallmark corporation to increase quarterly sales. Generally agreed upon to include Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, Father’s Day, and essentially any pseudo- holiday that a card can be sold for.

Jimmy panicked when he realized he hadn’t gotten a card for his dad’s special day, but then quickly relaxed when he realized it was a Hallmark holiday - Father’s Day - and the card was optional.

by Grant Rampus June 20, 2021

Hallmark Movie Syndrome

Single women who try to interfere in marital relationships because they think "they'll be right" for reporting that a spouse might be committing infidelity, with no evidence and acting with actual malice, for a multitude of (usually selfish) reasons instead of minding their own business.

Samantha, who has never been married, has Hallmark Movie Syndrome (HMS) because 1) she was convinced that Aubrey and Tim were cheating on their spouses and 2) acted on her own disinformation to spread rumors 3) they were actually pultonic best friends, but Samantha cannot fathom this because she has HMS.

by Eddy L January 27, 2023

Hallmark movie

The worst movies to exist. Especially the Christmas movies. all hallmark movies are the same and you probably won’t enjoy them unless ur a sad, lonely, 30 year old who can’t find love. Everytime my mom watched one I want to commit crimes. Though, this is only my opinion.

Your mom:i love hallmark movies!
Me:yeahhhhh no. Give me ur husbands number and get out.

by n0t_Ash December 30, 2021

hallmark movies

The best fucking movies ever. Everybody hates them, but around the holidays, they're like cocaine. They all have the same goddamn plot, but it never gets old. Friends will tell you that these movies suck, but they are fucking wrong. Hallmark Christmas movies are my babies, my fucking cinnamon apples.

OMG THE HALLMARK CHRISTMAS MOVIE COUNTDOWN STARTED! GET THE HOT CHOCOLATE BITCH! I FUCKING LOVE HALLMARK MOVIES!

by fizzman457 January 1, 2016

Hallmark Hall of Fame

The only possible destination for Major League Baseball steroid cheaters.

If Barry Bonds becomes an actor he might make the Hallmark Hall of Fame.

by tirtle January 31, 2017

Hallmark Pretty

A blonde woman who looks pretty, like the girl you know from high school, but is not as pretty as Hallmark wants you to think she is. Alternate, she isn't pretty enough to get that prince or hot farm hand.

That girl definitely isn't ugly, but she's not hot either. She's Hallmark Pretty.

by Poopfacezoe2020 November 20, 2020