Anal Glaucoma

Anal Glaucoma is when a person can not see their ass doing a certain task.
Housecat "I can't make it to work this morning, I have anal glaucoma something fierce."

Boss " Never heard of such."

Housecat "I just can't see my ass coming to work today."

Boss "I've heard em all now.!!!"

The master sergeant hoped that the Lance Corporal has a good excuse for missing formation.

Anal Glaucoma devil dog, very well marine very well, as you were.
by Woodhippie September 22, 2022
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gluteal glaucoma

A bullshit excuse for not coming in to work. or to cancel plans. "Gluteal" literally means ass, and although "glaucoma" is technically an eye disease, another definition of the word can also be: "a poor excuse". So this phrase basically translates to "my ass ain't coming to work and I don't have a good excuse".
John: "hey boss, I'm not coming to work today".

Boss: "wtf John? Why not?"

John: "I have Gluteal Glaucoma".
by dillonstrider413 March 11, 2024
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