masturbatory accoutrements

A pretentious expression used to describe one's personal collection of items used to enhance masturbation. (Dirty magazines, dildoes, lubricant etc.)

A way of describing an unenthusiastic sexual partner.
Also can be used to describe how one felt during sexual relations with an untalented or selfish partner.

Once I've retrieved my collection of masturbatory accoutrements, I shall commence with the jerking of my jizzer.

We were sleeping together, but she always just laid there. She was more like a masturbatory accoutrement than a fuck buddy.

All he wanted to do was get off and then leave. For all the pleasure I got out of it, I felt more like a masturbatory accoutrement than someone who'd just gotten laid.

by dumbslut August 10, 2006

Masterbaterium

A room build or allocated for the sole purpose of spanking yer love hose, wanking in general or having a wankparty. Usually painted an off yellow colour and containing a sink and towels.

I will be back in a moment Im just going to polish my bishop in the Masterbaterium. Good boy, make sure you use the wanklock on the door.

by DrLoveNuts July 25, 2007

masturbation elbow

overdoing a good thing

masturbation elbow:

how'd ya hurt your it?
too much fun

by asparagus nerd June 25, 2010

multimedia masturbation

n. The act of pleasuring one's self (usually a male) using various sources of inspiration.

George was bashing the bishop in front of his computer screen whilst jpegs and mpegs of his favourite pr0n were being displayed. In addition, he had nudie magazines arranged at convenient angles, and the television was playing some Aurora Snow movie on DVD.

by keyshaw September 2, 2005

Masturbation Station

1. A place where it is common to find a person hunched over masterbating.
2. Any area with a quiet corner, preferably in a room with fewer than 7 people.
3. Like a train station, except you masterbate there.

The other day Tom was walking down the street, and noticed an abandoned ice cream truck; there were only 2 hobos inside, so he crawled to the front seat and made it a mobile Masturbation Station!!

by D-Smoov December 9, 2008

speed masturbation

To masturbate furious and achieve orgasm in a matter of seconds. Usually happens when a man suffers premature ejaculation or when he has very little time to masturbate.

I once did speed masturbation and climaxed in 15 seconds- a personal best.

by Skyboy September 22, 2005

masturbatable

Worth considering while masturbating.

Street: Man who sit on toilet, high on pot.
Wil: Thats masturbatable.

by kgnrp March 13, 2011