taint welding

To reach a point of stress, anticipation, or engaging an act that is so extreme that you clench the cheeks of your buttocks together so tightly, that your taint is effectively welded together.

John was driving so recklessly that Steve was taint welding in the passenger's seat

by TK42FUN May 4, 2015

taint wad

The rolled up kleenex that a man will stuff between your butt checks to soak up the sweat during the heat of the summer.

It was a hot humid steaming day and John was concerned that his taint wad was slipping from his crack!!

by SugarCube May 23, 2013

lip taint

The ditch-like trough between the columella of the nose and the middle of the upper lip. Anatomically known as the philtrum.

Johnny's mustache will not grow in his lip taint.

by seerowdy January 10, 2014

taint dial

when shitting in a public restroom, one may be afraid to rest your phone on a strange surface. the only other option is to rest it in your underwear as a safety net. depending on how the long the wipe takes, one may forget to remove the phone. once the pants are pulled up and snug, you may dial the phone with your taint

Damien: "i was on the toilet so long the other night, i forgot i rested a mean game of angry birds on my drawers. wouldn't you know when all was said and done, i taint dialed my mom. plus, the phone smelled like burnt tacos for a week."

butt dial
pocket dial

by luvitwenucallmebigpasta July 17, 2012

fetal taint

The space between the genitals and the butt hole of a fetus. usually undefined until the fetus is spawned.

Guy: you fag!
Guy2: you fetal taint!
Guy: what?
Guy2: you are week and cant tell if your a boy or girl yet

by Rock the fetus hard October 30, 2011

suck taint

A term used in order to tell someone to fuck off or to say suck my dick, usually in a situation where the person you say it to is making no sense or they're an idiot

OP:" Where are we?"
Victim: " Goodhue County one Goodhue County nine"
OP: "Suck taint! That's not helpful"

by QuebxcOnVocab July 23, 2020

Tainted Willy

The act of poking a poo covered finger into the facial orifice of another person causing immediate smell shock.

My ear smells horrible and I am in a state of shock because Billy gave me a tainted willy last night.

by candy ass124 January 19, 2010