There are two types of Coopers in this world.
The first
one will be the kindest
soul you will ever meet. Somehow, if he sees you sad in public, he will approach you will listen, never judge, and speak pure wisdom. Statistically,
99% of the
time, this kind of Cooper can and will change your life for the better. If you have a Cooper like this in your life, never lose him.
The other kind of Cooper is the complete opposite. He is a loud and obnoxious plonk who will stop at nothing to ruin your life. This may indeed involve homewrecking and possessiveness, not uncommon for this type. He will constantly make the world well aware of his 67 fetish, and is openly
Republican/MAGA despite not knowing shit about American
politics. He is a master manipulator and can make anyone act blindly against their own interest. If you know this type, disown him at once.
Person
one: OMG YOU MUST MEET MY NEW BF
Person two: Who?!?
Person
one: His name is Cooper and he's
6"...
Person one interrupts: Please genuinely fuck off
