Murphy's Rule

When all else fails.
Read the directions.

Usually becomes necessary after Murphy's Law has run it's course.

After putting out all the fires, and cleaning up the mess, the crew decided to obey Murphy's Rule and read the directions!

by mayfieldenator March 12, 2023

Two-Inch Rule

If a married woman fucks a man with a dick two or more inches larger than her husband's penis, the act does not count as cheating

Husband: "Hey babe what did you do today"

Wife: "Oh, your boss came over and fucked my brains out."

Husband: "WTF! We're getting a divorce!"

Wife: "No, it doesn't count , because his cock was 8 inches and yours is only 6."

Husband: "Oh, yeah your right, thats the Two-Inch Rule."

by btcterms March 29, 2023

my house my rules

Every narcissistic parent's favorite argument, only rivaled by "if you don't like it, move out". Expect to be told that even if you help pay bills/rent/mortgage/utilities.

Kid: "Hey, could you please turn the music down? It's 3am, and I have college classes in the morning"
Parent: "My house my rules! You sleep on your own time!"

by That thing in your eye March 31, 2023

three strike rule

When you take a dump three times before having to start your day at work. It is an automatic day off.

I called off work today and told them "I struck out". I broke the three strike rule.

by tripleRdeuce April 21, 2023

Bart switch rule

Every stop on the Berkeley train station you have to stand and give your spot to a stranger

Jhon: I’ve been standing for a long time we have to do the Bart switch rule
James: of course

by Thebartdaylyer May 4, 2023

The Matias Rule

This rule states that every time you go for an ass grab, you have to first ask "is this okay?", and then proceed to feel whether or not she has individual cheek seperation, because if she doesnt, shes fat.

"how was it with that girl last night, did you use the matias rule?"
"you know i did."

by Saviiiiiaaaan May 10, 2023

three second rule

The rule goes as follows...
"If a food item falls to the ground and you pick it up in less than 3 seconds, you can pick it up"

*Friend drops an entire pizza upside down*
"three second rule"

by NuovoAntares May 11, 2023