Meet Ronald — a self-proclaimed “investment guru” in his late 20s to early 30s, who somehow manages to project the confidence of Warren Buffett while possessing the financial acumen of a Magic 8-Ball. Ronald’s entire portfolio is held together with vibes, memes, and whatever happens to be trending on r/WallStreetBets that week. If it’s got a rocket emoji next to it, Ronald’s all in.
He has no formal education in finance — unless you count the YouTube rabbit hole he fell into after watching The Big Short once and deciding he “gets it now.” His primary investing strategy? Simply disagreeing with whatever Jim Cramer says. If Cramer says buy, Ronald screams sell, and vice versa. He calls this “inverse Kramer logic,” and believes it’s Nobel-worthy.
Ronald often refers to himself as “diversified,” which in his case means he owns shares in a bankrupt movie theater chain, a crypto coin named after a dog, and a startup that claims to be the Uber for pigeons. He dishes out unsolicited financial advice like candy at Halloween, especially during parties, weddings, and funerals.
Despite his track record of turning every $100 investment into a $14 lesson in humility, he insists he’s “just one short squeeze away from early retirement.” You can often find him on his phone yelling things like “I told you AMC would moon again!” while desperately trying to remember his Robinhood password.
Ronald isn’t just playing the market — he’s playing himself, and somehow, still thinks he’s winning.
He has no formal education in finance — unless you count the YouTube rabbit hole he fell into after watching The Big Short once and deciding he “gets it now.” His primary investing strategy? Simply disagreeing with whatever Jim Cramer says. If Cramer says buy, Ronald screams sell, and vice versa. He calls this “inverse Kramer logic,” and believes it’s Nobel-worthy.
Ronald often refers to himself as “diversified,” which in his case means he owns shares in a bankrupt movie theater chain, a crypto coin named after a dog, and a startup that claims to be the Uber for pigeons. He dishes out unsolicited financial advice like candy at Halloween, especially during parties, weddings, and funerals.
Despite his track record of turning every $100 investment into a $14 lesson in humility, he insists he’s “just one short squeeze away from early retirement.” You can often find him on his phone yelling things like “I told you AMC would moon again!” while desperately trying to remember his Robinhood password.
Ronald isn’t just playing the market — he’s playing himself, and somehow, still thinks he’s winning.
by Factsonly619 May 4, 2025
Get the Ronaldmug. Do you can't do that you can't be a Ronald Schwarzenegger no stupid bastard don't be him or your bastard
by The basterdly bitch December 16, 2020
Get the Ronald Schwarzeneggermug. ronald doesn’t share his lollipops. he plays roblox and doesn’t want to play roblox with thais. he is very ronaldy and watches one piece. he loves to poop on peoples lawns. especially thais’.
by poopydinosaour January 5, 2021
Get the ronaldmug. Ttg quan- is that u smelling like that bit
Seven-what u talking about dude
Ttg quan-u smell like a ronald
Seven-what u talking about dude
Ttg quan-u smell like a ronald
by Shhssvs January 16, 2019
Get the Ronaldmug. by Pedrolovespussy February 19, 2023
Get the Ronald Mcdonaldmug. You're lucky and blessed if you have a Jeffery Ronald Antony Francias with you. He's best at singing and dancing. His dishes would leave you awestruck. He's a great chef. His partner is so much blessed. He is rare. And he has 6 pieces of dark chocolate below his chest. He is hard and hot. He acts the cutest to his close ones. After all, he is a gem.
by anonymous November 22, 2021
Get the Jeffery Ronald antony franciasmug.