Rectal clap

When you are sucking in air thru your ass to make a fart but you push out your muscles while holding your butthole open. It makes a clapping sound and makes a rancid smell.

I was gonna butt suck but then I felt my butthole stay open so instead I just had some rectal claps.

by FigaroFrank August 1, 2017

Rectal Crunches

The simultaneously contracting your abdomen and sphincter muscles in a effort to conjure up a fart out of thin air.

Bob is amazing. The way he can blast a fart after a few rectal crunches deifies logic.

by Steve the Buckaneer March 10, 2019

Rectal Speedboat

A rectal speedboat is where your partner is in the bath, you run in hover your anus just in the water and let out a ripper fart, the sound that follows sounds like a backfiring speedboat engine

Oh my partner ruined my bath last night and gave me the rectal speedboat

I’ve been victim to a rectal speedboat

by Siege of Society December 13, 2018

Rectal Spaghetti

When you rip your asshole open and shit comes out covered in blood. The shit is the noodles and the blood is the sauce.

“Yo this nigga just made rectal spaghetti gotta get this nigga to the hospital”

by the Rectum popper January 28, 2019

Rectal Russian Roulette

When you're having gut distress and want to pass gass ut afraid it'll turn into something more, it becomes a game of rectal Russian roulette.

(See sharting.)

"My stomach hurt so bad I was afraid to fart, it was like a game of rectal russian roulette!"

by WeirdAndWildWords January 15, 2023

Cranial-Rectal Impaction (Syndrome)

A condition wherein the patient's rectum is blocked (impacted) by their own cranial matter, resulting in the following symptoms: inability to think critically, difficulty processing rational arguments, loss of desire to collaborate. Oddly it does not impact the ability to pass flatus.

Those suffering from this condition also often suffer from procto-milontas.

Nurse - the patient is clearly suffering from a cranial-rectal impaction (syndrome). Please provide 30 mg of Thorazine and be prepared to perform an attitute adjustment.

by Patrol Jeff May 11, 2023

Rectal Rice

When maggots are crawling around in the rectum, typically on rotting corpses

I once saw a homeless guy with rectal rice. Nastiest shit I've ever seen

by JustASpy November 28, 2023