When you and your Canadian boys are out at the bars on a Friday night and an American named Jacob walks in the door. Jacob started his night drinking with his friends in Murica’ but somehow gets separated and ends up in Canada with no recollection of how he achieved this feat as Jacob is piss drunk. Jacob instantly becomes a crowd favorite at the bar and part of your inner circle. As the night goes on it turns into a weekend filled drinking fest where Jacob ends up pulling off the Canadian Adele, Canadian Mud Puddle, Canadian Cannon Ball, as well as the Canadian Bottle Opener. As Sunday night rolls around you know that you have to set Jacob free. But you know if you set him free that one day and time he will return. You put your best Sasquatch mask on Jacob, cover him in maple syrup (more on why to follow) and your old hockey gloves. You and your crew bring Jacob to a hockey game where you put the bug in his ear about stealing the Zamboni. As Jacob jumps the boards butt ass naked still covered in maple syrup and wear the hockey gloves. As security tries to tackle and subdue Jacob he slips right out of their grasp on account of the maple syrup. Jacob achieves the theft of one of Canadas national treasures. As Jacob is driving the Zamboni across the Rainbow Bridge, police cars lights and sirens on following close behind, he has one hand with a Duce Duce of Canadian Lager the other is waving his fondest farewells to you. Knowing one day Jacob will be back but for now Jacob Gone.
by Artie J Saves April 7, 2026
Get the Canadian Jacob Gone mug.Person 1: “Why are they fucking out there? it’s -40 outside!”
Person 2: “They’re probably just trying to experience a good ol’ Canadian Wet And Cold”
Person 2: “They’re probably just trying to experience a good ol’ Canadian Wet And Cold”
by catgekko666 April 15, 2026
Get the Canadian Wet And Cold mug.Related Words
candad • Candada • candaddyan • Candadian • candado • candado chino • el candado • Canada's History • Canada • canadians
That’s a load of Candace, dude.
What? That’s totally Candace!
You are acting like a freaking Candace right now, stop it.
I’m going full Candace on these people, seriously.
Did you hear about Jay getting fired? Total Candace.
What? That’s totally Candace!
You are acting like a freaking Candace right now, stop it.
I’m going full Candace on these people, seriously.
Did you hear about Jay getting fired? Total Candace.
by Kelly Jordan October 20, 2025
Get the Candace mug.Canadium is the forgoten 119th element on the periotic table, the atomic symbol is "Eh" with a atomic mass of a toonie, 6.92 grams per square centimeter. Canadium is a non-toxic metal that is safe too handle without any sort of protection.
Canadium can be found in Canadium mines in Canadium rich areas which are exclusive Canada. The most common uses for Canadium is, a secret ingredient for A&W products and poutine, this is what makes this food so delicious, the other uses for Canadium is putting small quantities in drinking water, this is partialy what makes canadians so smart and non-hostile, unlike the country south of the border (you know what Im talking about) another use of Canadium is as fuel for BCferries' ferries. the most common place you could find Canadium is in Albertia, this is the leading cause of a mostly rat free population another use is an ingredient for concrete which is used for housing foundations. Unfortunately this is the main reason why Canadian housing is so expensive, and what makes this worse is since there is SO much snow and coldness, It is hard too mine in the Canadium mines becasue of very hard dirt not too mention that canadium is very hard as it is. Canadium is very good fertilizer, this is why the prairies (including Albertia) has such good soil for planting wheat and other crops like barley.
Canadium can be found in Canadium mines in Canadium rich areas which are exclusive Canada. The most common uses for Canadium is, a secret ingredient for A&W products and poutine, this is what makes this food so delicious, the other uses for Canadium is putting small quantities in drinking water, this is partialy what makes canadians so smart and non-hostile, unlike the country south of the border (you know what Im talking about) another use of Canadium is as fuel for BCferries' ferries. the most common place you could find Canadium is in Albertia, this is the leading cause of a mostly rat free population another use is an ingredient for concrete which is used for housing foundations. Unfortunately this is the main reason why Canadian housing is so expensive, and what makes this worse is since there is SO much snow and coldness, It is hard too mine in the Canadium mines becasue of very hard dirt not too mention that canadium is very hard as it is. Canadium is very good fertilizer, this is why the prairies (including Albertia) has such good soil for planting wheat and other crops like barley.
Another drill bit broke while I was drilling in the Canadium mine. Is that a spec of Canadium on that cheese curd? Canadium prices have gone up by 2.5% this week! Hello, I would like too see how much is ingot of Canadium is worth in Canadian Tire money, please.
BCferries has just recently raised their fare prices from $75 to up too $90 for a standard vehicle! this must be because of Canadium.
BCferries has just recently raised their fare prices from $75 to up too $90 for a standard vehicle! this must be because of Canadium.
by mynameisnonofyourbuisiness14 October 25, 2025
Get the Canadium mug.by Atlasisthicc69 November 6, 2025
Get the Canadian Chilly Chomper mug.by Migger123 November 9, 2025
Get the Canadian Milk Bag-Phenomenon mug.When a person witnesses a Canadian couple having sex, specifically in the cow girl position, and the hand move from the shoulders to the ass cheeks of said rider.
by FireHawk438 November 12, 2025
Get the Canadian Touchdown mug.