microsoft

evil and bad company

person 1: i work at microsoft
person 2: DIE!!!!

by p01uyt September 5, 2024

Micropoliphobia

The irrational fear of towns with fewer than 50 buildings.

After driving through a nearly deserted village on her last trip, Lily realized her micropoliphobia was worse than she thought.

by Phobia guy December 20, 2024

Microsoft Compatibility Telemetry

A buggy process that opens 4 times a day on windows 10/11 and takes up all your RAM and CPU usage.

"why the hell is my computer acting so buggy?"
opens task manager
''Microsoft Compatibility Telemetry taking up 40 decillion gigs of ram please throw out computer and give us more money right now or we'll kill you.

by iminhellplshelpahhh December 27, 2024

Microsoft Product

Any product that is poorly designed, easy to hack, bloated, annoying to use, laggy, full of unwanted features, or prone to frequent malfunction.

Not always necessarily a Microsoft product or even any kind of software.

“Sorry I’ll be a little late to the meeting, Teams is being a Microsoft product again.”

“That new game I got off Steam last month crashed five times while I was trying to play it. What a Microsoft product.”

“My new bike’s frame has already started to bend and break like the Microsoft product it is.”

by Shepherd Guy March 14, 2025

microsoft

bad or disgusting

"My day is like Microsoft so far"
"That is so Microsoft"

by grok2 May 9, 2025

microscopic

your cock.

Woah dude! Your cock is microscopic!

by HawkTonyTuah May 10, 2025

Microsofted

"You Just Got Microsofted"
(verb)

When a company gets so dominant and cocky that government regulators slam them with antitrust lawsuits, lawsuits, restrictions, or public humiliation — just like Microsoft in the late '90s.

Examples:

“Bro, Nvidia locked AI devs into CUDA again.”

→ “Oh damn… they’re about to get Microsofted.”

“Apple’s gatekeeping USB-C till the EU forced ‘em.”

→ “Classic Microsofting.”

by Brokugeta May 28, 2025