paint the ceiling

Whack off. Most commonly in a lazy boy armchair.

I think im gonna stay in tonight, pop in a porn and just paint the ceiling

by Col. John C. Hosebag July 18, 2006

paintball

does not shoot 550fps it shoots 300fps you fucking moron

paintball is the best sport invented

by Bob March 21, 2004

Splatter-Paint

The act of a female removing a used tampon and swinging it above her head in a circular motion.

You can tell Jamie is on the rag becuase she just splatter-painted the bathroom...it's a bloody mess.

by Jewexican May 22, 2006

Alaskin Paint Job

After a stripper is done dancing for the patron a skid mark is left on the patron.

My new pair of jeans received an alaskin paint job last night.

by NY Tripod May 14, 2011

Paintbrush

(v.) - To make a paintbrush motion with one's dick on a woman's vagina. A man does this when he is either put in a predicament in which he does not want to engage in sexual intercourse or he is simply out of condoms and wants to play it safe.

"She just dropped her pants and bent over. I didn't know what to do so I just paintbrushed her for a little bit."

"I ran out of condoms, and I do not want any kids so i just paintbrushed her clit a bit."

by KrizAlin1 October 24, 2009

paint sprayer

You must have the beer shits or be sick with diarrhea to perform the paint sprayer.Its when a woman or man is tossing your salad and you leave a long wet fart spraying them in thier face with wet shit. When you are done it should look like someone painted thier face brown

Me and Tina are getting serious I gave her ,her first paint sprayer last night. She brought her face up out of my ass covered in runny shit ,looked at me with tears in her eyes and said "I love you".Then we sat there and cried together for hours it was truly a beautiful moment.

by jay from catty June 22, 2009

reverse wraparound painted seagull twist

A fantastic and triumphant sexual move. extremely pleasurable to both parties, although the woman is left paralyzed from the waste down 60% of the time. This move can only be performed on the beach because the man must anchor his feet into the sand for maximum thrusting power. You start off by having the woman perform a headstand, reach up between the dude's legs and tickle his grundle while he proceeds to fuckin plow the shit out of the girl's juicy crotch goblin. Most of the time one of those huge fucking mythical creatures will come lumbering over the dunes dragging a ten foot boner and join in the fun, but not all the time.

Hey Bill!

Yeah Bob?

I was giving Nancy the ole reverse wraparound painted seagull twist down on the spit the other day, and wouldn't ya know it? A huge goddamned elephant tyrannosaurus duck came outta nowhere and doused me in toothpaste.

by Peter Pan's Left Nut October 14, 2008