bed mumbler

A person who speaks in a low and poorly articulated voice when sleepy or recently awoken, so that you have to constantly ask them to repeat themselves. Especially refers to people whom you're lying in bed with.

you: So we should do this again sometime babe.
bed mumbler: (incomprehensible rubbish)
you: What?
bed mumbler: (incomprehensible rubbish)
you: Wait, say that again.

by imwithbeardy February 28, 2009

bed condom

a large sheet of plastic used to cover someone's dirty bed before you sleep in it while they're not home.

he sleeps around so much that i had to put a bed condom on his bed before i crashed in it.

by the real frank the tank April 21, 2009

dirt bed

A separate bed reserved for doing dirt in, as opposed to your regular bed, which is for nite nite.

Ryan Higgins ate some fries on his dirt bed. He put the ketchup straight on the sheets.

by vwallac January 20, 2014

Bed salt

Small crumbs or random shit on the bed the size of salt, that annoys you while you try to sleep and end up brushing off

Fuck I can't sleep with all this bed salt on the bed, I have to brush it off

by Windowsweirdo October 14, 2020

Cheese in bed

Just cheese in bed really? Little Laurenz songs and that. Based off Send my love to your new lover. Who has cheese in bed.
Made in 2015/2016 by accident.

Only real intellectuals know

LL: You know that song?

AA: I know....
BOTH: CHEESE IN BEDDD

by The Wandering Arab February 12, 2022

Bed Fizz

When one is comfortable in bed with all necessities and luxuries at arms reach, a full body fizzing orgasm is sent throughout the body followed by butterflies and a large grin.

Husband: Can you get the remote and my Zoo mag?
Wife: Yep there you go.
Husband: mhmmhmhmmh (Bed Fizz)

by s s l November 1, 2011

Bed-Reading

The action of placing a book in your right hand, running full speed at your bed, jumping precisely five feet away from the mattress, completing a one hundred and eighty degree spin while simultaneously crossing the book between your legs. You then land on your back with the book open and proceed to read your story of choice.

Bed-Reading is an extreme sport, only for the elite.

by dirkdiggler12 December 4, 2016